托福写作十宗罪.doc

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1、托福写作十宗罪 托福写作十宗罪,这些错你犯了几条?快来看看吧,下面就和大家分享,来欣赏一下吧。托福写作十宗罪,这些错你犯了几条?1、不一致不一致(Disagreements)除了主谓不一致之外,还包括数的不一致、时态不一致及代词不一致等等。例如: Watching TV too much are bad for our eyes.看电视太久会对我们的视力造成伤害。剖析:不定式、v-ing形式充当句子主语时,谓语动词用单数形式。本句是典型的主谓不一致。同学们在考场上难免紧张,很容易无意识地犯下这种不该犯的错误。建议同学们留出10分钟左右的时间,逐句检查。改为:Watching TV too mu

2、ch is bad for our eyes.2、句子不完整写作和口语有一个极大的不同之处,就是在口语当中,说话人即使表达不完整,听者也能通过上下文语境、手势、表情等,理解对方的意思。可是写作却不同,句子结构的不完整(Sentence Fragments)会令意思表达不清,可能使读者二丈和尚摸不着头脑。这种情况经常会发生在写完一句句子之后,笔者又想对前面一句话添加一些补充时发生。例如:There are many ways to learn English. For example by reading English novels, listening to English radio, t

3、aking courses and so on.剖析:后半部分“For example and so on .”不是一个完整的句子,仅为一些不连贯的词语,不能独立成句。改为:There are many ways to learn English, for example by reading English novels, listening to English radio or taking courses.3、悬垂修饰语悬垂修饰语(Dangling Modifiers)是指句首的短语与后面句子的逻辑关系混乱不清。例如:To help raise peoples living stand

4、ards, basic healthcare is a necessity.剖析:句中不定式短语 “To help raise peoples living standards” 的逻辑主语不清楚。改为:To help raise peoples living standards, the government should provide basic healthcare.4、不间断句子不间断句子(Run-on Sentences)指的到底是什么呢?请看下面的例句。例如:There are many ways we get to know the outside world.剖析:这个句子包

5、含了两层完整的意思:“There are many ways。” 以及“We get to know the outside world.”但简单地把它们连在一起就不太妥当了。改为:There are many ways for us to learn about the outside world. 或:There are many ways through which we can become acquainted with the outside world.5、词性误用词性误用(Misuse of Parts of Speech)指的是考生在写作的过程中,不考虑单词的词性和词法功能,

6、单纯地从词义对照的角度出发来运用单词,从而造成病句。例如:I against these rules because they are not so good.剖析:本句是典型的词性误用,against 是一个介词。需要与be 动词一起构成谓语成分。改为: I am against these rules because they are useless.6、指代不清指代不清是指代词与被指代的人或物关系不清,或者出现前后代词不一致的情况。例如:Alice and my sister are neighbors, and she always invites her to her house.剖

7、析:在这句话中,读者无法明确地判断这两位姑娘到底是谁邀请谁去家里做客。所以在写作中,我们应该尽量避免容易引起误解的代词,将所指对象加以明确,方便理解。改为:Alice and my sister are neighbors, and she always invites my sister to her house.7、措词问题造成措辞问题的原因,往往是由于很多中国的学生习惯用中式思维造句,然后再在脑子里把中文翻译成英文。特别是在考场上由于时间紧迫,学生经常想到一个词,拿来就用,完全不考虑措辞的搭配是否合理。另外,很多学生喜欢在考前背老师给的,或者是网上自己找的模板,这些模板良莠不齐,很容易对

8、学生造成误导。正确的做法应该是在平时养成查英英字典的好习惯,同时多积累一些地道的表达。例如:Therefore, teenagers are more likely to make a crime in this sophisticated society.剖析:这句话中“make a crime”就是典型的措辞误用,“犯罪“的地道表达应该是”commit a crime”。 其次,很多同学喜欢写一些看上去很长,拼写很复杂,不明觉厉的词,例如这句话中的“sophisticated”,以为会让考官眼前一亮,但英文中实际不存在这种搭配,复杂的社会用“in this complicated soci

9、ety”比较合适。改为:Therefore, teenagers are more likely to commit crimes in this complicated society.8、累赘言简意赅其实也是一种能力。句子短小精悍,实际上比为了凑字数而写出不必要的长句要有用得多。因此我们的原则是:能用单词的就不用词组,能用词组的就不用从句。例如: Considering the fact that the problem is very complex,the government needs to take more targeted measures.剖析:本句的“the fact t

10、hat the problem is very complex”系同谓语从句,按照上述的原则,我们可以用词组来替换这个从句。改为:Considering the complexity of problem,the government needs to take more targeted measures.9、不连贯不连贯主要指的是两个句子缺乏逻辑上的联系,前文不搭后语,或者连接词使用的不准确。这也是考生最常犯的一个错误。所以在练习写作时,必须要有意识地加强句子之间的逻辑。例如:Home-working enables employees to make a better balance b

11、etween career and family. Working at home can free people from the sudden changes of weather.剖析:乍一看,这两句句子表达清晰,用词正确,好像没有什么错误,但却忽略了两句句子之间的联系。两句话都是描述在家工作的优点,我们可以用“whats more”、”in addition”等词来表达一种递进关系,这样就使*的层次更丰富。改为:Home-working enables employees to make a better balance between career and family. In ad

12、dition, working at home can free people from the sudden changes of weather.10、修饰语错位英语与汉语不同,同一个修饰语置于句子不同的位置,句子的含义可能引起变化。对于这一点中国学生往往没有引起足够的重视,因而造成了不必要的误解。例如:The refrigerator was sold to us by a salesman with a money-back guarantee.剖析:本句中究竟是salesman有money-back guarantee,还是冰箱有?虽然也许能根据句意推断出是冰箱有退款保证,但是这里的

13、修饰语错位还是给读者带来了不小的困扰。改为:The refrigerator with a money-back guarantee was sold to us by a salesman.20XX.05.06托福独立写作范文(友谊篇)20XX.05.06托福独立写作范文(友谊篇)Do you agree or disagree with the following statementIt is impossible to be completely honest with your friends all the time.总是对你的朋友绝对诚实是不可能的。5月6日这场托福考试的独立写作题

14、既普通又特别。普通之处在于它重复20XX年12月17日的原题。特别之处在于它又是一道关于友谊的题目。最近关于友谊的独立写作题出现得确实有些频繁,从4月1日的“朋友犯错是否该继续这段友谊”到和15日的“该交聪明的朋友还是幽默的朋友”,再到今天这场“能否对朋友一直诚实”,friend 或者 friendship 真有点刷屏的嫌疑。不过,ETS喜欢刷同类题,早在4月15日这场的解析中我就指出过,当时我的原话如下:“并不是说翔哥预测能力有多强,而是官方出新题成本太大,再加上最近他们玩疯了各种ABCD卷,旧题出现的频率确实呈上涨趋势。此外,按以往规律来看,独立写作同类话题,有集中出没的现象。所以针对每场

15、考题去练习同类旧题,在下一场碰到的机率还是不小的。”另外还有个刷存在感的词是诚实 - honesty,这个词在今年第一场1月7日托福考试出现,当时问的是 Do you agree or disagree: If you are selecting a leader for a student organization, honesty is the most important to consider in deciding whom to vote for. 你同意不同意:投票选择学生组织的领导时,我们最需要去考虑的是诚实。虽然考的话题不一样,但无疑都在问我们,诚实到底是不是最重要的。正所谓

16、套路玩多了,甚至一点都没有,最终也必将是玩“套”自焚。但是很多也说,朋友之间虽说不会为了一己私利而编天大的谎言,但是可能为了对方着想,尤其是一些特殊情况,撒点善意的谎言在所难免。鉴于大部分人会选择写同意此观点,我就任性一次,选择不同意。真正的朋友之间是可以没有任何套路的,不服来辩。托福写作范文Although a vast majority of people agree that how to choose right friends and build healthy relationships with them is especially important, they are spl

17、it in their opinions over what is the most important consideration in a friendship. Among all the possible considerations, always telling the truth is taken into account by not a few people. Then, is it possible to be always completely honest with your friends? The answer is, as far as I am concerne

18、d, surely in the affirmative.It is true that being completely honest might hurt our friends feelings. Take a frequently-occurred situation as an example. Alvins friend Kikyou, who buys a new outfit for a birthday party, asks him, Does it look good on me? Alvin, based on the fact, says, No way! It ma

19、kes you look ten pounds heavier. Upon hearing his answer, Kikyou may return him with a hostile glare. Indeed, these truthful words, to a large extent, are not pleasing to a friends ears, though they might be said with the best intentions. Nevertheless, a true friend is willing to tell us the truth,

20、no matter what. And if we get irritated or even indignant, we do not really respect him or her and treat him or her as a true friend. Moreover, a true friend, knowing we might not be so comfortable with negative comments, would certainly choose to answer in a gentle but not brutal way. Alvin would s

21、ay he is partial to the one Kikyou wore yesterday to show his unfavorable view of that outfit.Most importantly, friendships, especially long-term ones, are not built in one day. Regular flattery or flat-out lies may help us forge new friendships or even maintain those relationships for a period of t

22、ime, yet only by being completely honest to those we feel and care will the friendship stand the test of time and stay stable for a sizable chunk of life, or even for our whole life. This is because complete honesty can build up mutual trust between friends. As long as trust keeps a constant presenc

23、e, misunderstandings or obstacles to any friendship can be avoided and removed if occurring.In conclusion, I disagree with the statement, and I highly recommend that everyone should have the courage to blurt out any truthful words. Just make sure to respond without jealousy or anger.20XX年6月3日托福写作真题分

24、析: 看友识人托福独立写作题目Do you agree or disagree with the following statement? One can learn a lot about a person from the type of friends this person has.从一个人所交朋友的类型,能深入了解这个人。写 作 解 析据新航道考生回忆来看,本场考试写作部分难在 task1-综合写作,阅读材料的篇幅比较长,比平常的要多出四分之一的内容。不过好在阅读材料仍然在陈述三个要点的段落,贴心地提供了小标题,帮助我们提炼每段重要信息。task2 独立写作,题目如上所示,考的是20

25、XX年11月份的原题,虽然时隔多年,很多同学觉得跟新题无异。但是令人开心的是,题目又是一道跟朋友相关的话题,今年上半年官方看来是跟人际交往杠上了,嗯,没毛病,ETS爸爸开心就好。纵观历年考题会发现,官方以前还考过类似的一道题,问 “从一个人的穿着打扮,能否了解这个人的性格特点”。不仅考过了解个人,其实还有了解某个国家。最经典的一道题当属你同意不同意参观博物馆是了解一个国家的最好方式。很多同学在写这道题会从不同意角度去写,因为参观博物馆只能了解一个国家的某些方面,比如过去的历史,文化等,但是要全面了解这个国家,最好是去那个国家旅行,甚至工作一段时间。当然其他方式还有看书看报看新闻,看视频等等。该

26、题按这样的思路展开写不同意,肯定完全可以,但本场考题,不建议不同意,因为题目语气没那么绝对,只是说通过朋友类型可以了解,并没有刻意强调是最好的方式。同意的话,我们可以谈及很多朋友都是因为志趣相投才走到一起,比如某个人身边有一群逗比朋友,那说明这个人也不太可能是非常正儿八经的一个人,即使看起来如此,但私底下肯定有逗比搞笑的一面。再者很多人是因为都喜欢某种音乐或者某一本书才认识,所以也能通过这类朋友了解某个人喜欢什么音乐,看什么书或者吃什么。不同意当然也可以写,可以谈及有时候交朋友不一定是有相同性格特点,而很有可能是刚好相反,性格上的互补也会促使两个人走到一块。比如一个内向的人身边可能有多个外向的

27、朋友,这样这个人就不会一直自己寂寞孤单冷。另外每个人身边的朋友至少有几个,而每个人也会展现多种性格特点所以很难从这么多的朋友中判断他到底是什么样的人。20XX年5月27日托福独立写作真题分析托福独立写作题目:Which one of the following values is the most important to share with a young child (5-10 years old)?1. being helpful2. being honest3. being well organized跟5到10岁小孩子分享一个价值观,你觉得下面哪个是最重要的:1 乐于助人2诚实待人

28、3 组织能力强又是一道三选一的题目,今年上半年已经出现了三道这样的题目,等等,这个写作题目似曾相识,就在本月13日考过,一! 模! 一! 样! 是的,我们都没看错,5月27日这场考的就是两周前才考过的原题(点这里看原题)。关于 ETS 爸爸喜欢出原题,我早就分析过多次,尤其是在今年3月份出现多卷阅读和听力之后,旧题重复的现象明显增加。而写作方面的一个明显套路是某一个词反复出现在不同的题目中,强行刷脸,或者会就某一个话题出不同的变异题。我在5月6日这一场的解析中提到 honest 这个有刷屏的嫌疑。另外还有个刷存在感的词是诚实 - honesty,这个词在今年第一场1月7日托福考试出现,当时问的

29、是 Do you agree or disagree: If you are selecting a leader for a student organization, honesty is the most important to consider in deciding whom to vote for. 你同意不同意:投票选择学生组织的领导时,我们最需要去考虑的是诚实。而本场考题我在5月13日这一场的解析中也提到它就是一道变异题。每个人都是从小屁孩成长为翩翩君子或者窈窕淑女,不过真要我们在育儿上说出震古烁今的真谛,尤其是考场限时情况下,还真不是每个人都能做到的。幸运的是,这次5月13

30、日的三选一考题又是一道变异题,所给三个选项都是之前考过的总之,千言万语的趋势分析汇成一句话:赶紧关注我们北美考试精英汇,分分钟教你拿下托福考试。这套题,当时的思路当然仍然适用。如果选择分享乐于助人的价值观,可以谈及教小孩子学会与他人相处,收获更多朋友,慢慢成长为一个有社会责任感的好青年。选择分享诚实待人,可以谈及能帮助规范小孩子的行为,同样也能帮他们建立良好的人际关系。选择分享组织能力,更多地可以从小孩的自律,以及独立处理问题的能力这些方面切入探讨。既然 honest 这么喜欢刷脸,那我下面的*就选择 being honest,在写法上采取常规的主讲being honest 的两个好处,算是比

31、较容易上手,供大家参考。6月10日托福写作解析 - 去考场吃中饭还是考完回家吃晚饭?全国范围内的部分托福考点网络系统出现问题,导致很多考场的考生未能及时进场考试,被告知在外面等待。有的考场学生等了半小时不到就进去了,而有的等了2小时,更悲催的是个别考场,那真是永久的等待,等了3个小时以上。不少考生因此萌生了标题所问,是继续等待,等2个小时在考场吃饭,还是等3个小时,考完回家吃晚饭。不管实际是哪种情况,鬼知道这些考生经历了什么。最最悲伤的是有的考场部分电脑出问题,耽误考生十多分钟,所以在这些考生终于回到电脑前做听力时,旁边的人开始说口语了。而当旁边的人开始进入写作部分时,他们自己又开始 desc

32、ribe the city,简直是互相伤害啊。最最令人哭笑不得的是,说了半天在考场吃饭,最后的写作部分还真考在哪吃饭的问题。原题如下:20XX年6月10日“Some people like to buy and eat their meals at restaurants frequently, while others like to cook most of the meals at home and rarely go to the restaurant. Which do you prefer? Why?”有些人喜欢经常下馆子,其他人却很少这样做,而总愿意在家做饭。你喜欢哪种方式,为什

33、么?写 作 解 析这道题目是其实是 ETS 爸爸在 20XX 年以前老托考试所用写作题库(包含185个话题)中一道题,改革以后的新托福考试独立写作仍然沿用题库里的内容,但是官方发现好多鬼崽子直接背范文照搬,于是慢慢削减原题的使用,开始出各种变异题,当然也会出新的独立写作题目。在家弄饭的好处自然无需多言,吃得更健康,吃得更省钱,最重要的是能有大把的时间跟家人呆在一起,这种黄金时间在现代社会弥足珍贵。比如妈妈弄饭,爸爸打下手,儿子负责饭后洗碗。吃饭时一家人有说有笑,因为在自己家,什么都可以聊,什么都可以玩。让十岁的儿子背个唐诗三百首,五岁的闺女跳个六一儿童节的舞蹈,其乐融融,岂不美哉。在餐馆吃饭更

34、多是为了庆祝某个重大事件比如生日,升学等,或者就是三五个好友一起吃顿饭,唠唠嗑。既能增进亲朋好友间的感情,又是一种娱乐消遣,正所谓独乐乐不如众乐乐。再者不少餐馆大厨的手艺还是很赞的,不论是菜式,还是味道,绝对拉家常菜几条街。平心而论,私以为下馆子这事还是不要太频繁,人啊,还是常回家看看,常回家吃吃饭。20XX年6月25日托福托福独立写作题目范文写作题目:Do you agree or disagree with the following statement: It is better to work for business owned by someone you dont know th

35、an for the business owned by your family.题目翻译:给别人工作要比在家族企业干好词伙:1. elbow their ways 挤2. Royal roads 捷径3. Spare no effort to do sth 不遗余力干某事4. Increase the productivity 增加生产力5. Explore potential 开发潜能Sample answerNowadays, as a great number of graduates finish their universities, they elbow their ways t

36、hrough the crowds in the job market. Although some hold the idea that facing with such a tough competition, it is better for graduates to work for family business to enjoy the royal roads that have paved for them, I believe that working for others plays a vital role to the development of students fu

37、ture careers.First of all, it is working for others that enhances our ability to communicate, a skill critical for career development. In the workplace, people spare no effort to communicate directly with high efficiency and the supervisors give advice to candidates candidly so that employees are ab

38、le to follow the leaders the commands to increase the productivity afterwards. More often than not, for the sake of the company, the leaders may yell at candidates because they have expressed ideas ambiguously, resulting in the loss of profits. Lectured by the bosses, we are easy to gradually gain t

39、he approach to communicate with main points, ignoring the irrelevant parts and delivering the relevant sections, the way that better improve the communicative efficiency in the company.In addition, by working for others, we are easy to explore our potential. Making profits is the first step of the c

40、ommercial activity for the company, while hiring the fewest employees to work on the most jobs provides such a shortcut. If we work in the company, we have penchant to carry out more than one jobs, work around clocks, all of which constantly challenge our limits. But it is these challenges that upgr

41、ades ourselves rapidly. Being able to survive in this critical moment at the younger age, we are more likely to live in any other harsh condition, like what Darwin in his theory survival of the fittest, thus increasing our chance of survival in the growing ferocious job markets.According to the reas

42、ons that I have mentioned above which are working for other explores our potential and enhancing our ability to communicate, I am able to draw up the conclusion that working for others motivates people, triggers peoples passion and enthusiasm. Therefore I would strongly recommend working for others instead of working in the family business.

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