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1、摩登家庭ModernFamilySeason11Episode16Part2Calmdown.蛇只会把蛋都产在一个黑暗的地方Snakeslayalltheireggsinonedarkplace.我已经全拿出来了我这就送到宠物店去vegotthemallhere.mgonnarunthembythepetstore.天其中一个在动吗快拿走Oh,myGod.Isoneofthemmoving?Getthemoutofhere.真是太恶心了恶心恶心恶心Theyresogross.Gross,gross,gross,gross.嘿你这是要跑到哪儿去啊小家伙Hey,whereyourunningoff
2、to,littlebuddy?你又想跑到哪儿去啊大家伙Andwhereareyourunningoffto,bigbuddy?你好啊陌生人Hey,stranger!又要出门吗我坡近几乎都见不着你Goingoutagain?Ibarelyseeyouthesedays.我也想跟你一起玩杰dlovetohangout,Jay,但我要参加红酒俱乐部的聚会butvegotawineclubmeeting.你喜欢红酒吗我超爱红酒的What,areyouintowine?Ilovewine!好吧回头见等等-Okay.Seeya.-Waitaminute!我等会儿就开瓶红酒mgonnaopenabottle
3、lateron.不如你带一瓶回来我们一起品品酒Whydontyoubringoneandwe,llhavealittletasting?这主意还不赖IguessIwouldntmindthat.我回来时去趟商店llstopbythestoreonmywayback.既然都去了顺便发个慈悲帮我买♥♥瓶汽水吧Whileyourethere,wouldyoubeaprinceandpickmeupasoda?我得跟功课奋战vegothomework.你哪来的五十大钞Wheredyougetafifty?不劳你费心Dontworryaboutit.欢迎来到你们的新家Welc
4、ometoyournewhouse!我不记得这房♥间这么冷冰冰没人味啊Idontrememberthisroomfeelingsostarkandcold.幸好这是智能房♥子1.uckilythisisasmarthouse.亚当暖光模式Adam,warmlightmode.已启动Initiating.不不好Oh,no.no!不这样只让窗边的霉菌更显眼rNo,thatjustbringsoutthemoldingaroundthewindows.这里是不是有点像养老院啊I.Doesitfeellikewereinanursinghome?亚当派对模式Adam,par
5、tymode!已启动Initiating.天啊不这更糟了Oh,God.No!No,that,s.that,sevenworse.我抱歉m.msorry,Ijust.我就是觉得自己好像没来过一样Idontfeellikeveeverbeeninthishousebefore.亚当我警告你我对天发誓Adam,IsweartoGod!已启动Initiating.我们是不是犯了个大错Didwejustmakeahugemistake?米奇尔你知道你讨厌改变啊Mitchelbyouknowyouhatechange.还记得你剃光胡子那次吗Rememberwhenyoushavedyourbeard?你对
6、着镜子尖叫老天你丑绝人寰”Youscreamedinthemirror,Oh,myGod,youlookhideous!*那是你好不好Thatwasyou.你今天一整天都抱怨个不停Imean,youhavebeenacraballdaylong.你怎么知道的你都没跟我们在一起Howdoyouknow?Youhaven,tevenbeenaroundus!我照你尿性猫的Itookacrazyguess.听着这是买♥♥家的懊悔情绪1.ook,thisisbuyersremorse.我从我的导师菲尔邓菲那学到的Ilearnedthatfrommymentor,PhilDu
7、nphy,我知道如何能解决andIknowhowtofixit.跟我来如果你还想活Comewithmeifyouwanttolive.在这栋房♥子里并且不想当个扫兴鬼inthishouse.andnotbeabummertoeveryone.莉莉你得帮我开始拆箱了1.ily,youneedtohelpmestartunpacking.我们需要继续谋划二宝的盛大揭示Weneedtoworkonmybabyreveal.亚当思考模式Adam,thinkingmode.已启动Initiating.我知道这听起来很疯但真有用的Iknowitsoundscrazy,butitworks.为
8、了接受新房♥子Inordertoacceptthenewhouse,你必须跟原来的家好好告别youhavetoproperlysaygoodbyetothisplace.我才不要对着一栋房♥子说话呢Okay,Imnottalkingtoahouse.Okay?还有搬家工人为什么坐在外面不干活And.Andwhyarethemoversjustsittingoutthere?别担心我会搞定他们Dontworryaboutthem.llhandlethem.我以前也当过搬家工人Iusedtobeamover.我帮前男友偷他兄弟的冰箱时Ikindoffellintoitw
9、henIhelpedanex-boyfriend自然而然就进入了这，行stealhisbrothersrefrigerator.等等所以你当过出租车司机美发师Okay,wait,soyouvebeenacabdriver,ahairdresser,代言模特还当过搬家工人aspokesmodel,andamover.你的人生是真实的吗I-Isyourlifereal?世上有什么是真实的吗Isanythingreal?我当哲学教授时ThatwasaquestionthatIaskedmyself时常问自己这个问题whenIwasaphilosophyprofessor.好了跟这房♥子
10、道别吧Now,saygoodbyetothehouse.告诉它它对你的意义Tellithowmuchitmeanttoyou.对彼此坦诚说出真心话就像两个Behonestwitheachother,liketwolovers知道终于要分道扬镶的爱人一样thatknowthatthetimehascomewhentheymustpartways.好吧通常我就只是Okay,well,usually,Iwouldjust把我得健身房♥会员卡从他钥匙扣上摘下来takemygymmembershipoffhiskeychain然后把他介绍给我妈认识andthenintroducehimto
11、mymother.你好小房♥Hey,house.你们这些懒鬼Hey,youhumps!我们是按小时付你们费的Werepayingyoubythehour!我们正休息喝咖啡女士We,reonacoffeebreak,lady.别给我来这套Oh,dontgivemethat.我以前也是干这行的Iusedtodoyourjob.就是你们这种态度让大家讨厌搬家工人Andthisattitude,thisiswhypeoplehatemovers.以及偷东西的恶习Thatandallthestealing.太过分了你以为你能做得更好吗Whoa!Youthinkyoucandobetter?
12、我也不想戳破你的“泡泡”膜Ihatetoburstyourbubblewrap,但老娘知道我能butIknowIcan.其实我们今天还预约了另一家这样正好了Weactuallydoublebookedtoday,sothisworksout.你自己搬吧-不不不等等-Haveatit.-Oh,no,no,no,no!Ay,wait!回来啊懒鬼Comeback,humps!你怎么在摧残猫Whatareyoudoingwiththecat?别担心嘛到那天Okay,don,tworry.Ontheday,我会用宝宝换掉拉里的IwillreplaceLarrywiththebaby.等全家都围着桌子坐好
13、Oncethefamilyisallseatedaroundthetable,我就解开安全绳llundothesecurityrope然后让宝宝在桌子上方飘过andthenletthebabyhoverabovethetable让所有家人为之惊叹forallthefamilytomarvelat.等等电♥话♥响了Wait.Phone,sringing.喂Hello?是我Yes,speaking.什么What?不No!老公你刚才是喝错r装染料的杯子吗Oh,honey,didyoujusttakeasipfromthepaintbrushwater?如果喝错了我会知道的
14、啦克莱尔IthinkdknowifIdiClaire.这一定就是祖父母坐的老人桌吧Oh!Thismustbethegrandparentstable!-话不能这么说-不我觉得不是-1wouldntsaythat.-No,Id.Idon,tthink.这两位是宝宝们的外祖父母阿嬷阿公Thesearethekidsgrandparents,GammaandGrampy.很高兴认识你们呀Oh,nicetomeetyou.我是姥姥这是姥爷mMeemaw.ThisisBobo.你们见过嬷嬷和爷爷了吗HaveyoumetGimGimandMimsy?不如你们坐我们的位子吧Oh,youknowwhat?Wh
15、ydontyoutakeourseats?我们好像坐错桌子了Ithinkwereatthewrongtable.我的背Oh!Myback!我也常闪到腰Oh,ithappenstomeallthetime.我来告诉你这种老人鞋的牌子名mgonnagetyouthenameoftheseshoes.道格我已经替你做过饭Doug,Ihavecookedforyou,帮你喷过美黑喷雾spraytannedyou,还帮你代过两次转招牌的班takentwoofyoursignspinningshifts.我还没赎完罪吗Areweseriouslynotevenyet?你把这事看得太严重了Ithinkyou
16、remakingtoobigadealaboutthis.我只是需要你穿上小丑女的变装服IjustneedyoutodressuplikeHarleyQuinn然后给我游戏之夜的赢家做脚底按♥摩♥而已andgiveafootmassagetothewinnerofmygamenight.别担心Dontworry.赢的的会是我mgonnawin.听着杰拉德又摔倒了Andgetthis,Geraldfellagain.这次摔断了手腕Wristthistime.那老头体内的钢钉针比裁缝含在嘴里的还多Thatman,sgotmorepinsinhimthanatailorsmouth.他就是不肯学正确的摔倒姿势Heneverlearnedhowtofalltherightway.-自尊心太强了一等等摔跤还有正确姿势的吗-Tooproud.-Wait,theresarightwaytofall?你不是吧还搭话Really?Afollow-up?要抵抗住用手撑地阻止摔势的诱惑Resistthetemptationtobreakthefallwiththehands.改用屁屁着地
