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1、大家好欢迎来到Pawnee两百年纪念寻宝游戏Hello,everyone,andwelcometothePawneeBicentennialScavengerHunt.准备好迎接一整天的寻宝甚至可能是几天复数Getreadyforafulldayofhunting,maybeevendays!Plural!聊够了Enoughtalking.线索拜托谢谢Clues.Pleaseandthankyou.1.eslie警告过我说Ron是大♥师♥级的解谜人1.esliewarnedmethatRonwasamasterpuzzlesolver.所以我超越了我自己So,Iha
2、veoutdonemyself.这是寻宝游戏中的LadyGagaThisistheLadyGagaofscavengerhunts.一部完整的天才之作包裹在Acompleteworkofgeniuswrappedup一团令人迷惑的文化分心物品之中inadisorientingmixofconfusingculturalredherrings.宝藏埋藏在Ramsett公园最西南端的椅子下面Thetreasureisburiedbeneaththesouth-westernmostbenchinRamsettPark.你怎么可能已经解出来了呢Howcouldyouhavepossiblyfigur
3、edthatoutalready?一旦我确定了密♥码♥筒是错误导向之后OnceIdeterminedthecryptexwasafalselead,我意识到卷轴上的隐藏线索可以用完全列移位密♥码♥解出Irealizedthehiddencluesonthescrollscouldbesolvedwithincompletecolumnartransposition.换位后形成的词语般是与数字相关联Thetransposedwordsoftennumericallylinktonumbers,得到的序列暗示的是纬度和精度thesequenc
4、eofwhichsuggestedlatitudeandlongitude.然后就是简单地使用我脑中六分仪的事情了Then,itwassimplyamatterofaccessingmymentalsextant.我震惊了mshocked.我把这个寻宝计划送给印第安纳解谜协会征求意见IranthishuntplanbytheIndianaPuzzlers*Guild他们5个福尔摩斯烟斗的评分给了5个andtheygaveitfiveoutoffiveSherlockpipes.留着吧别感觉糟镂Keepit.Anddontfeelbad.这是我的魔咒It,smycurse.公园与游憩公园与游憩第
5、7季第9集第7季第9集我们得过一遍初选之前的日程表我们来聊工作Weneedtogooverthescheduleleadinguptotheprimary.Letstalkshop.哦聊工作我五种最爱的聊之Ooh,shoptalk.Oneofmyfivefavoritetypesoftalk,还有睡前闺蜜真心话和TED演讲alongwithpillow,girl,real,andTED.你为啥要穿个斗篷啊Whyareyouwearingaponcho?哦因为你们房♥子里的每一个表面都是粘的Oh,becauseeverysurfaceareainyourhouseissticky.
6、我上次来的时候我外套上有根融化的蜡笔1.asttimeIwashere,Ifoundameltedcrayononmyblazer.好吧我明天和Gryzzl有个宣传拍照Okay.IhaveaphotoopwithGryzzltomorrow.在此之前我们安排了一大堆的事情Betweennowandthenwehaveatonofstuffscheduled.看起来我们必须跳过烤馅饼活动1.ookslikeweregonnahavetoskipthepiebakingevent以及仪式扔南瓜了andtheceremonialsquashtoss.哦真的吗我们得跳过了Oh,really?Wehav
7、etoskipthat?我爱看那些南瓜飞在空中的样子啊Ilovewatchingthosesquashesflythroughtheair.我有点喜欢它们落地的时候Ikindoflikethewaytheyland.我也是Me,too.好了打扰一下但我必须回到城市里去了Okay,excuseme,butIhavetogetbacktoacity,事情发生的地方wherethingshappen.好的这场竞选要正经开始了Okay.Thiscampaignisabouttostartinearnest.情况真的会变得很紧张的你准备好了吗Thingsareabouttogetrealintense.
8、Youready?哦是啊我已经做好了我的打气混音带Oh,yeah.Ialreadymademypumpupmix.有多到出人意料的PatBenatar-棒啊TheresasurprisingamountofPatBenatar.-Nice.我是在和LeSIie说IwastalkingtoLeslie.我Leslie吗-是啊Me,Leslie?-Yeah.嗯我曾是实际的候选人所以我觉得我能处理做一个候选人的妻子Well,Iwasanactualcandidate,soIthinkIcanhandlebeingacandidateswife.我了解所有的议题从内到外Iknowalltheissue
9、sinsideandout.嗯你看那就是问题Mmm,see,that,stheproblem.如果你就是个蠢货我就在你身上按个国旗胸针Ifyouwerejustading-dong,Iwouldjustslapaflagpinonyou,嗓子里灌点安♥定♥片♥就行andpoursomeValiumdownyourthroat.一切都会很好的Everythingwouldbefine.就是那些聪明人才会让人抓狂Itsthesmartiesthatfreakpeopleout.我觉得你低估了选民们Ithinkyoureunderestimatingthev
10、oters.我觉得那不可能啊Idontthinkthatispossible.做谁谁的夫人可是个雷区Beingthewife-ofisaminefield.对吧BenRight,Ben?你知道要不你把它当成大学第一年的做♥爱♥Youknow,whydontyouthinkofitlikesexfreshmanyearofcollege?你只想在让自己不尴尬的情况下尽量快地熬过去Youjustwanttogetthroughitasfastaspossiblewithoutembarrassingyourself.我用这个类比是为了帮助你musingthatasana
11、nalogytohelpyouout因为我假定你成熟得很晚becausemassumingyouwerealatebloomer.我可不是我第一天开始就搞定了Notme.Icrusheditfromdayone.Stephen小心一点Stephen,becareful!斗篷Poncho!我知道通常你讨厌基金会Iknowyounormallyhatefoundations,但这个我觉得你应该会喜欢butthisone1thinkyoullactuallylike.我们接收不知道自己想做什么的人Wetakepeoplethatdontknowwhattheywannado然后把他们送去世界各地做很
12、酷的事情andthenputthemtoworkdoingcoolstuffallovertheworld.我几个月之后就开始AndIstartinacouplemonths.嗯我期待你能选个更有尊严的行业比如砖石或者伐木Well,Ihadhopedyoudchooseamoredignifiedtradelikemasonryorlogging.但你已经从本地政♥府♥中走出去了Butyouareoutoflocalgovernment,那就是往正确方向的第一步andthatsastepintherightdirection.这肯定是我想要的工作Itsdefinit
13、elythejobIwanted.但这也意味着我们必须搬去华盛顿ButitmeansthatwehavetomovetoWashington.嗯Well.那对你是好事Thenbullyforyou.如果你打算搬家我想你应该还回我房♥子的备用钥匙Ifyouintendtomove,Isupposeyoushouldreturnthesparekeytomyhouse.很多年前当你还是我助手的时候我以紧急用途给你的TheoneIgaveyouyearsagowhenyouweremyassistant,foremergencies.好吧Okay.聊得不错Goodtalk.这片街区已经
14、荒废很多年了Thisneighborhoodhasbeenmostlyabandonedforyears.但现在感谢Gryzzl新总部的建设Butnow,thankstothenewGryzzlheadquarters,这块地区即将转换为未来数十年的创新枢纽thisdistrictwillsoontransformintoahubOfinnovationfordecadestocome.Wyatt先生MrWyatt.呃我猜我要回答问题了是啊是什么TedUh.Guessmtakingquestions.Yeah,whatisit,Ted?你的竞选公布了一个日程表Yourcampaignrelea
15、sedaschedule.看起来你的夫人要跳过馅饼玛丽活动了AnditlookslikeyourwifeisskippingthePieMary.介意解释一下吗Caretoexplain?馅饼玛丽是一项南印第安纳的传统ThePieMaryisaSouthernIndianatradition,国会候选人的妻子们在一场烤馅饼比赛中对峙whereCongressionalcandidateswivesfaceoffinapie-bakingcontest.上届比赛的赢家是JuneHartwell的脱脂乳蛋白酥Thelastcontest,swinnerwasJuneHartwellsbutterm
16、ilkmeringue.上届比赛的输家是全体女性1.astcontest,sloserwasallwomen.1.eslie会是第一个不参加馅饼玛丽的候选人♥妻♥子1.esliewouldbethefirstcandidateswifenottoenterthePieMary.你跳过这个比赛是想发表什么声明呢Whatkindofastatementareyoumakingbyskippingit?我们我没发表任何类型的声明Were.mnotmakinganykindofstatement.我们只是在关注更重要的事情Werejustfocusingonbiggeris
17、sues,比如Ben的1.5亿美元经济复苏计划likeBens$150millionrevitalizationproject.不好意思借过一下不好意思抱歉Pardonme.Ineedtogetthrough.Pardonme.Excuseme.这里是MikePattersonMikePattersonhere.1.eSlie你表达得挺清楚了你觉得家政事务不重要1.eslie,youmadeitprettyclearthatyoudontthinkhomemakingisimportant你给你的孩子们做过饭吗Doyouevercookforyourchildren?而现在是谁在照看你的孩子们
18、呢Andwho,sevenwatchingyourchildrenrightnow当你在外面神都不知道在哪的时候whileyoureoutGodonlyknowswhere?你在说什么啊我就站在你面前啊Whatareyoutalkingabout?mstandingrighthereinfrontofyou.好吧冷静一下我们别生气Okay,takeiteasy.Let,snotgetemotional.好了我们必须得走了Okay,wehavetorun.我们在我的经济演讲再见Wellseeyouallatmyeconomicaddress.感谢各位的前来Thanksforcoming,ever
19、ybody.你还反对什么其他传统吗LeslieWhatothertraditionsareyouagainst,Leslie?棒球吗抱孩子吗Baseball?Huggingyourchildren?你的发型花了多少钱Howmuchdidthathaircutcost?不关你事而且感谢你注意Noneofyourbusiness.Andthankyoufornoticing.我的桌子就在这里啊Mydeskwasrighthere.一直坐在这块地上面的Sittingrightontopofitthiswholetime.是多少钱来着不是钱Howmuchmoneyisit?-Itsnotmoney.我
20、说过了是Ron的钥匙Itoldyou.ItsRon,skey.我很多年前藏在这里的Ihiditinhereyearsago.是没没钥匙Yeah.No.Nokey.就是张纸条一张电影票票根还有四颗牙齿Justanoteandamovieticketstubandfourteeth.“如果你在找Ron的钥虺我移走了IfyouarelookingforRonskey,Imovedit,”你永远找不到的APril谨上”andyoullneverfindit.Cordially,April.那你放在哪了呢Where,dyouputitthen?我不知道啊是八年前的事了Idontknow.Itwaseig
21、htyearsago.哦天Ron房♥子的一把钥匙在一栋政♥府&hearts次楼里搞丢了Oh,God.AkeytoRonshouseislostinagovernmentbuilding.这是他最糟的噩梦啊Itshisworstnightmare.听着宝1.isten,babe.我们要做的就是训练冠军闻出Ron的钥匙AllwegottadoistrainChampiontosniffoutRon,skey.好吧-我们只需要Ron的钥匙来给他一个味道Okay.-AllweneedisRonskeytogivehimascent.所以把钥匙给我Sogivemethekey
22、,我就能给你那把钥匙andllgetyouthatkey.不你才是错的主持人MikePattersonNo,YourewrongwithMikePatterson.欢迎【可到节目我的来宾是JUneHartWeIIWelcomebacktotheprogram.MyguestisJUneHartwell,现任国会议员PaulHartwell的夫人wifeofincumbentCongressmanPaulHartwell.现在JUne我们都知道BenWyatt的夫人真正想说的是什么Now,June,weallknowwhatBenWyattswifeisreallysaying.通过跳过馅饼玛丽
23、她在说的是ByskippingthePieMary,shessaying,”热爱家庭的女人都很愚蠢”Womenwholovetheirfamiliesarestupid.Mike我们都要做一些选择Mike,weallmakecertainchoices.Knope女士选择拥有一切Ms.Knopechosetotrytohaveitall.我选择把家庭放在首位Ichosetoputmyfamilyfirst.哦我只是在推测Oh,mjustspeculatinghere,但你觉得LeslieKnope的行为暗示着butdoyouthinkthatLeslieKnope,sactionsindica
24、te她实际上憎恨她的家庭吗thatsheactuallyhatesherfamily?嗯只花了三个小时就证明Jen是对的了Well,itonlytookthreehoursforJentoberight.我已经IE式成为分心事了mofficiallyadistraction.我要参加那场馅饼玛丽mgonnaenterthatPieMary.这只是胡闹而已都会平息的Thisisjustnonsense,itllblowover.而馅饼玛丽荒唐而过时AndthePieMaryisridiculousandantiquated.但他们越谈论这件事Butthemoretheytalkaboutthis
25、,就越不会谈论你的经济计划啊thelesstheyregonnatalkaboutyoureconomicplan.此外我很擅长烤馅饼Besides,mgoodatmakingpies,所以我会赢然后我就能soIllwin,andthenIcan推广我自行出版的女性权益烧烤菜谱promotemyself-publishedwomen,srightsbarbecuecookbook女性灌木TheFeminineMesquite.一切都会没事的Everything1Sfine.除了你得买♥♥个新计算器Exceptyouregonnaneedtogetanewcalcul
26、ator因为我在看这个节目时因一股无名怒火把这个捏碎了causeIcrushedthisoneinablindragewhile1waswatchingtheshow.接着找啊是个我曾经用来藏东西的小小棕色盒子Keeplooking.Itsasmall,brownboxwhereIusedtohidethings.顶上画了只老鹰Ithadaneagleonthetopofit.我找到了这个但上面有只猎鹰Ifoundthisone,butithasafalcononthetop.我接着找Illkeeplooking.不那个就是就是那个AndyNo,thatsit!ThaCsit,Andy!老鹰猎
27、鹰无所谓了-才不是无所谓呢Eagle,falcon,whatever.-Notwhatever.老鹰更强壮有更强的能力Eaglesaremorerobust,havestrongertalents.没上好鸟类学校吧DidntgotoBirdSchoolmuch?好吧我们来看看Okay,letssee.Garry的结婚戒指Tom的手表Kyle的车钥匙Garrysweddingring,Tomswatch,Kylescarkeys.怎么回事啊Whattheheck?等等等等我六年前把那枚戒指掉进了下水道啊Waiwait.Ilostthatweddingringdownthesewergratesi
28、xyearsago.我知道啊然后我钓出来了让我能放在我的巫♥毒♥娃♥娃♥上Iknow.AndIfisheditout,soIcanputitonmyvoodoodoll.不在里面我必须跑了Itsnotinthere.Ihavetorunaway.就这样了ThatsitGaITy再见我们要永远消失了Garry,goodbye.Weredisappearingforever.你是个好人对我曾对你做的一切感到抱歉YoureanicemanandmsorryforeverythingIdidtoyou.再见-宝别听着Goodbye.-Babe,n
29、o.Listen.我们可以很简单地走那条路Wecouldeasilygothatroute.开始执行幽灵协议InitiateGhostProtocol.碟中谍4副标题我们换脸用酸烧掉指纹Weswitchfaces,weburnourfingertipsoffwithacid,我们在克里姆林宫下面的隧♥道♥里住着我们很轻松就可以那么做WeliveinthetunnelsbeneaththeKremlin.Wecoulddothateasily.但这件事没那么严重Butthisisnotthatbigofadeal.诚实就好Justbehonest.告诉他你搞丢了他的钥
30、匙来吧Tellhimyoulosthiskey.Comeon.Garry我收回一切我恨你Garry,Itakeeverythingback.Ihateyou.不敢相信这么多年之后Icantbelieveafteralltheseyears.哎呀Jeez.我放在了个安全的地方然后我为了保护它移走了1haditinasafeplace,andthenImovedittoprotectit,然后我不记得是哪儿了andIdontrememberwhere.我知道了Isee.别生气啊RonDontbemad,Ron.她藏得太好了而且留下了一系列的线索Shehidittoogood,andshelefta
31、stringofclues.这是个不可能的谜题Itsanimpossiblepuzzle.而我爱解谜AndIlovepuzzles.一张极简的没用的便条Aminimal,unhelpfulnote.这些看起来是人类的牙齿Theseappeartobehumanteeth.而这是什么暮光之城新月吗Andwhatisthis?Twilight:NewMoon?是部电影但我没看过It,samovie,butveneverseenit.是就关于没劲的狼人啊还有吸血鬼之类的Its,like,aboutlamewerewolvesandvampiresandstuff.Donna喜欢那种东西Donnali
32、kesthosethings.十拿九稳这指向她的方向Dollarstodonutsthispointsusherway.终于一场值得我花时间的寻宝游戏Finally,ascavengerhuntworthyofmytime.前进Onward!好了零食给了被子盖了书读了Okay,snacksgiven,kidstuckedin,booksread,三个孩子同时没理由地崩溃了threesimultaneousmeltdownsfornoreason,被子又盖回去了有一个不知怎么短暂跑出去了kidstuckedbackin,oneofthembrieflygotoutsidesomehow,孩子们回
33、到床上了他们都睡下了kidsbackinbed,they,reallnapping.好我准备了你统治馅饼比赛所需的一切Good.Igoteverythingyouneedforpiedomination.我甚至搞了瓶额外的生奶油罐子Ievengotanextrawhippedcreamcan,一瓶用于烘焙一瓶用于直接入口oneforbaking,onefordirectlyintomouth.你太了解我了Youknowmesowell.那可能是孩子之一Thatmightbeoneofthekids.嗨LeslieHi,Leslie.EliseYarktin来自印第安纳妇女协会EliseYark
34、tin,fromtheIndianaOrganizationofWomen.哦天啊Elise请进请进Oh,mygoodness,Elise.Please,comein.等等你是要给我颁发年度女性奖了吗Wait.AreyouheretogivemetheWomanoftheYearaward?我演讲已经准备好了Ihaveaspeechprepared.你想看看吗就现在-不必了Wouldyouliketoseeit?Rightnow?-No.1.eslie我们太高兴地发现你在抵♥制♥那场离谱的馅饼玛丽1.eslie,Wewerethrilledtofindoutyouw
35、ereboycottingthatridiculousPieMary.但我们刚刚听说你又决定参加了Butwejustgotwordyouvedecidedtoenter?是啊嗯我也同意那很蠢Yeah,well,Iagreethatitsdumb.但这不是关于我的这是关于Ben的Butthisisnotaboutme,it,saboutBen,而他会比Hartwell对女性做出更多andhewilldomoreforwomenthanHartwell.所以你知道的输掉一仗赢得一战So,youknow,loseabattle,winthewar.那种情况就该是这样的Thatkindofthing.
36、Itsthewaytogo.所以应该的这样就是让女性倒♥退♥几卜年So,thewaytogoistosetwomenbackdecades.你看馅饼玛丽活动倒♥退♥而又厌女1.ook.ThePieMaryisretrogressiveandmisogynistic,如果你参加的话我们除了在活动上抗♥议♥你和Ben之外别无选择了andifyouparticipate,wewillhavenochoicebuttoprotestyouandBenattheevent希望你喜欢馅饼Hopeyoulikepies.拍在
37、你脸上Inyourface.隐喻地我们会很文明的Metaphorically.Wellbecivil.Elise没有谁比LeSlieKnope更愿意捍卫性别平等了Elise.ThereisnobiggerdefenderofgenderequalitythanLeslieKnope.而我的丈夫Ben是女性权益的先进拥护者Andmyhusband,Ben,isaprogressivechampionofwomensrights.宝烤箱准备好了Babe,theovensready.赶紧的烘焙时间到了Chop-chop,timetogetbakin.爹地想吃馅饼了Daddywantpie.嗨我是Be
38、nWyattHi,BenWyatt.我们有-组少到绝妙的线索Wehaveawonderfullysmallnumberofclues.一条是这张电影票Oneisthisticket.你看过这部关于吸血鬼之类东西的电影吗Didyouseethismovieaboutvampiresandsuch?新月吗是啊我是和April看的NewMoon?Yeah,IsawitwithApril.她拔了智齿之后吃止疼药太兴奋了Shewassohoppeduponpainkillersfromgettingherwisdomteethout,我说服了她跟我一起看Iconvincedhertoseeitwithm
39、e.那些牙齿是你的Theteeth.They,reyours.你真是超级没知觉啊Youweresuperoutofit.你一直朝屏幕喊着“伏地魔队”然后我们就被赶出去了YoukeptyellingTeamVoldemort!atthescreenandwewerekickedout.我真的暴怒了Iwasfurious.你只有一次机会看第二部暮光之城电影第七遍YouonlygettoseethesecondTwilightfilmfortheseventhtimeonce.你记得任何关于一把钥世的事情吗Doyourememberanythingaboutakey?或者April那天做过什么不寻常
40、的事情吗OrAprildoinganythingunusualthatday?她确实在我们离开之前去过一次擦鞋摊Shedidmakeusstopbytheshoeshinestandbeforeweleft因为她想给Andy捎点东西becauseshewantedtodropsomethingoffforAndy.她真是特别迷恋他啊Shehadarealbadcrushonhim.哦宝你迷恋我呢Oh!Babe.Youhadacrushonme.那也太尴尬了Thatsembarrassing.我们结婚了啊-还是啊Weremarried.-Still.去擦鞋摊Totheshoeshinestand
41、!哦追我啊-停下Ooh!Chaseme.-Stop.Garry你到底在干嘛呢Garry?Whatthehellareyoudoing?哦天啊Oh,gosh.嗯我把婚戒掉进这个下水道了Well,Idroppedmyweddingringdownthisgrate,而我在试着弄出来andthenIwastryingtogetitout结果我把钥匙也掉进去了所以我走不了了andIdroppedmykeysdowntheretoo,soIcan,tleave.但你猜怎么着用手♥机♥手电筒照一下我能看见Butyouknowwhat?Thelightfromthephone.I
42、canseeit.我就.Ijust.哦Oh!该死啊Dangit!我又乱丢东西了MyJitterbug.该死这让我想起从前啊Damn,thistakesmeback.介意我呆在这看吗MindifIstayandwatch?完全不介意我感谢你的陪伴Notatall.Iappreciatethecompany.哦你知道我能怎么拿出戒指吗Oh!YouknowhowIcangettheringout?我会把我的驾照和唯一一张信♥用♥卡♥像筷子-样夹着Iwillusemydriverslicenseandmyonlycreditcardlikechopsticks
43、.Garry别Garry,dont.嗯Mmm.真是的Nuts.别怕啊我还有护照Neverfear.Istillhavemypassport.等等让我看看你的章Wait,letmeseeyourstamps.IOW才不会乱来TheIOWdoesnotmessaround.这一般也是我爱他们的原因但现在我在另一边了WhichnormallyiswhyIlovethem,butnowmontheotherside.哦天啊Ben我每年给她们$100承诺费啊0h,myGod,Ben,Igavethem$100intheirannualpledge.你知道那能买♥♥多少反对我的
44、标语吗Doyouknowhowmanyanti-mesignsthatcouldbuy?或者甚至是横幅Orevenbanners.你就别参加馅饼比赛了显然Youjustdontdothepiecontest,obviously.那我们就又回到原点了Thenwerejustbackwherewestarted.然后看起来就像我在说我比做烘焙的女人们都强Thenitjustseemslikemsayingmbetterthanthewomenwhobake.我们应该怎么办我们应该离婚吗Whatshouldwedo?Shouldwegetadivorce?嗯要不这样呢Well,howaboutthi
45、s?要不我登记参加比赛呢WhatifIregisterforthecontest?我烤个馅饼我作为我自己的夫人1bakethepie.Iactasmyownwife.哦那样可行啊Oh,thatcouldwork.我们避开争议Wesidestepthecontroversy,我们重新把竞选焦点放在实际候选人身上werefocusthecampaignontotheactualcandidate.然后我们颠倒那个过时的传统Andthenwefliptheantiquatedtraditionrightonitshead.正是Exactly.但更重要的是我们改变一个馅饼的定义Butmoreimportantly,wechangetheideaofwhatapieis.我感觉那没有更重要Ifeellikethatsnotmoreimportant,但我喜欢我们现在的活力所以我们来听听butIliketheenergythatwehave,soletshearit.好的想象一下Okay,picturethis.饼皮在底下馅饼皮在顶上Crustonthebottom.Filling.Crustontop.我描述的是什么WhatamIdescribing?一个馅饼Apie.不但你找到了正确的“饺“度-哦No.Bu