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1、我们并非都是清教♥徒♥的后裔WerenotalldescendedfromthePuritans.不是吗-还有一个殖民地No?-Therewasanothercolony距离普利茅斯三十英里地图上没有标记快乐山30milesfromPlymouth,itsnotonthemapstoday.MerryMount.好吧你在书中提到Allright,youmentionedinyourbook.殖民地里做什么都行Thecolonywhereanythinggoeswent.不禁酒-酗酒淫乱Therewasbooze.-Therewasbooze,therewasforn
2、ication,玩音乐甚至therewasmusic.Theyeven.为所欲为Younameit,younameit.他们甚至每个月戴着面具围着Theyevendancedroundthemaypoleonceamonth五月柱跳舞崇尚天道wearingmasks,worshippingGodknowswhat,白人和印第安人一样得过且过whitesandIndianstogether,allgoingforbroke.谁对这一切负责Whowasresponsibleforallofthis?那人叫做托马斯默顿AcharacterbythenameofThomasMorton.清教&hear
3、ts;徒♥中的休海夫纳Ah,theHughHefnerofthePuritans.可以这样说没错Youcouldsaythat,yeah.我给你们读一段清教♥徒♥对默顿追随者的看法Erm,mgonnareadyouaquoteofwhatthePuritansthoughtofMortonsfollowers.“放荡的酒鬼和无神论者”Debauchedbacchanaliansandatheists“陷入到荒淫无度过着堕落的生活”fallingintogreatlicentiousnessandleadingdegeneratelives.听到这话我收
4、拾起行囊离开牛津直奔美国WhenIheardthat,Ipackedmybags,IleftOxford,IcamestraighttoAmerica,来到荒淫无度的美国Americathelicentious.那些人后来怎么样;清教♥徒♥把他们关了Sowhathappenedtoallofthosepeople?-Well,thePuritansshutthemdown.他们派来迈尔斯斯坦迪什率领民兵TheysentinMylesStandish,leadingthemilitia,hechoppeddownthemaypole,砍倒了五月柱砍倒了彩带和彩旗cut
5、downthosecolouredribbons,banners,everything,一切都完了-我们变成了一个partywasover.-Andwebecameanation古板的清教♥徒♥国家ofstraight-lacedPuritans?嗯-这难道不是你的观点Well.-Isntthatyourpoint,though?清教♥徒&hearts激了他们消灭了所有与性有关的东西ThePuritanswon,theystampedoutallthingssexual.你会如何描述性享乐幸福Howwouldyousay?-Sexualhappines
6、s.Happiness.完全正确直到二十世纪六十年代Exactly.Untilthe1960s.直到二十世纪六十年代再次在各地爆发Untilthe1960swhenitallexplodedagainallovertheplace.对大家都围着五月柱跳舞Right.Everyonewasdancingaroundthemaypole,然后then.要做♥爱♥不要战争Makelovenotwar.如果你还记得就在几十年前Ifyouremember,onlyadecadeearlier,在五十年代如果你想做♥爱♥ifyouwantedtoha
7、vesex,ifyouwantedtomakeloveinthe1950s,你必须乞求必须偷偷摸摸youhadtobegforit,youhadtocopafeel.或者结婚Orgetmarried.就像我在二十世纪六十年代那样AsIdidinthe1960s.有什么遗憾Anyregrets?很多但那是我们的隐秘Plenty.Erm,butthatsoursecret.别告诉别人Donttellanybody!这是你我之间的秘密Thatsjustbetweenyouandme.好像贝蒂戴维斯说过“老年不适合胆小者”IthinkitwasBetteDaviswhosaid,Oldageisnot
8、forcissies.*但托尔斯泰曾说过“人的一生中最大的惊喜ButitwasTolstoywhosaid,Thebiggestsurpriseinamanslife“就是步入老年”isoldage.老年悄悄来临Oldagesneaksuponyou,接下来你会问自己我问自己andthenextthingyouknow,youreaskingyourseltmaskingmyself“为什么老年人不能表现出他的真实年龄”Whycantanoldmanacthisrealage?“我怎么可能还沉浸”Howisitpossibleformetostillbeinvolved“在人类喜剧的肉&hea
9、rts;欲♥中inthecarnalaspectsofthehumancomedy?,因为在我的脑海里Because,inmyhead,什么都没有改变nothinghaschanged.她叫康斯薇拉卡斯蒂洛HernamewasConsuelaCastillo,是我的学生andshewasmystudent.这门课叫做实用批评Thiscourseiscalledpracticalcriticism.So.上课rlet,sgo.我们来讨论这个大问题Righttothebigquestion,shallwe?战争与和平是否会因为我们熟知而变成另一本不同的书DoesWarAndPeace
10、becomeadifferentbookbecausewereadit?是的当然会但是为什么Well,yes,ofcourse.Butwhy?因为我们给这本书带r些东西Becausewebringsomethingtothebook.我们自己的东西Webringourselves.而且十年后你再读这本书Whatsmore,youreadthebookagainintenyears,会因为你的改变而再次改变itllchangeagainbecauseyouvechanged.美在旁观者的眼中Beautyisintheeyeofthebeholder.我一直对女性美很敏感vealwaysbeenv
11、ulnerabletofemalebeauty.卡斯蒂洛小姐则不同姿态很完美MissCastillowasdifferent.Herposturewasperfect穿着就像著名律师事务所的年轻同事andshedresslikeayoungassociateofaprestigiouslawfirm.世故老练与众不同Therewasasophisticationthatsetherapart.她知道自己很漂亮Sheknowsshe,sbeautiful但不知道该如何处理自己的美貌butshesnotyetsurewhattodowithherbeauty.不不要记笔记老实说没有必要At.No,
12、donttakenotes,becausehonestly,itsnotworthit.真的别想了Really,don,t.dontgiveitathought.艺术作品会让你想起你现在是谁So,aworkofartremindsyouofwhoyouarenow.自从她们把性骚扰热♥线♥电♥话♥贴在我办公室楼下的走廊后Sincetheypostedthesexualharassmenthotlinenumberdownthehallfrommyoffice我就再也没有私卜联♥系♥过我的学生Inevermake
13、privatecontactwithanyofmystudents.直到她们结束这门课Untiltheyvereceivedtheirgrades.在那之后我为全班举办鸡尾酒会Afterwhich,Ialwaysthrowacocktailpartyfortheclass,而且非常成功anditsalwaysasuccess.想喝点什么Wantsomethingtodrink?科佩什教授我们昨晚在电视上看到你了ProfessorKepesh,uh,wesawyouonTVlastnight.你真棒-噢谢谢Youweregreat.-Oh,thankyou.杳理罗斯也很不错对吧CharlieRo
14、sewasprettygoodtoo,wasnthe?是的我猜Well.yes,Iguess!不真的很棒-你真好祝你晚上愉快No,itwasreally.great.-Youreverykind.Havealovelyevening.谢谢Thankyou.这是一种宏观视野It,sthecolossusOfperspective.关键是谁在观察对吧科佩什教授Itdependsonwhosobserving,right,ProfessorKepesh?西方人认为伊♥斯♥兰♥完整主义是落后的和危险的WesternersseeIslamicIntegralis
15、tsasprimitiveanddangerous而伊&hearts撕♥兰♥完整主义认为美国人是堕落的和腐♥败♥的whiletheIslamicIntegralistsseeAmericansasdepravedandcorrupt.十字军东征之后什么都没有改变NothingschangedsincetheCrusades.我们需要一个文明联盟Weneedanallianceofcivilisations.卡斯蒂洛小姐MissCastillo.嗨教授Hi,Professor.这是卡夫卡的亲笔信-对Isthisarealletterfrom
16、Kafka?-Yes.这是他写给米莲娜的信的原件别人送的礼物ItsoneoftheoriginallettershewrotetoMilena.Itwasagiftfromsomeone.亲近你的人Someoneclosetoyou.和我很亲近的人卡斯蒂洛小姐Someonewhowasclosetome,MissCastillo.叫我康斯薇拉不是在课堂别那么正规Consuela.Wearenotinclass,wedontneedtobesoformal.康斯薇拉Consuela.你会弹钢琴-是的Doyouplaythepiano?-Yep.能不能弹一曲人太多了弹不好Wouldyouplayf
17、orus?-Toomanypeople.dfreeze.你身上有种气质让人觉得你很拘谨Youknowtheressomethingaboutyouthatinvitesakindofformality.你是什么意思Whatdoyoumean?你有一种优雅的朴素Youhaveakindofelegantausterity.简朴-差不多吧Austerity?-Somethinglikethat.我想这是我父亲遗传给我的Well,IguessIgotthatfrommyfather.他严肃而高傲Heisaustere,andproud.典型古巴风格-他是古巴人VeryCuban.-He,sCuban
18、?我们全家都是古巴人我来的时候十一岁MywholefamilyisCuban.IwaselevenyearsoldwhenIcame.你高中毕业就直接上大学了Didyougostraighttocollegefromhighschool?不我在一家律师事务所做法律秘书No.Iwasalegalsecretaryinalawfirm.是吗-我努力过但我不喜欢Youwere?-ItrieditbutIdidntlikeit.我父母希望我能上大学所以AndmyparentsalwayshopedIwouldgotocollege,so.我经过努力考上了大学ImadeupmymindandhereIa
19、m.我给你看些东西MayIshowyousomething?就这个-戈雅Hereweare.-Goya.这画叫什么-着衣的玛哈Whatsthisonecalled?-1.aMajaVestida.还有呢And?还有-她和你很像And?-Sheresemblesyou.你很像她Youresembleher.真的Really?我想是的Ithinkso.你觉得怎么样我不知道Whatdoyouthink?-Idontknow.也许眼睛像Theeyes,maybe.为什么要谈论卡夫卡戈雅和她的古巴家庭WhyallthistalkaboutKafka,Goya,andherCubanfamily?别误会她
20、家是古巴人她喜欢我的课这很好Dontgetmewrong,itsgreatthatherfamilysCubanandsheenjoysmyclass但我继续唠叨主要是因为我想上她butIgoonyakkingawaymainlybecauseIwanttofuckher.我还能说什么-真心话WhatcanIsay?-Thetruth.房♥间里满是耳朵Thattheroomisfullofspies?我非常喜欢歌&hearts倨!）我爷爷带我去看歌♥剧I.Idoloveopera,mygrandfathertakesmetotheopera,我也很喜欢戏剧andIa
21、dorethetheatre.我为一家杂♥志♥评论剧本你愿意可以和我一起Ireviewplaysforamagazine.Wouldyouliketogowithmesometime?去剧院看戏Tothetheatre.好抱歉Yes.-Sorry.去看戏你干嘛不带她去舞会Gotothetheatre?Whydontyoutakehertotheprom?不你不明白这个女孩是No,youdontgetit.Thisgirlis.她是完全不同时代的复古者Shesathrowbacktoacompletelydifferenttime.必须向她求爱Shehastobewo
22、oed.我以为我们在讨论性Ithoughtweweretalkingaboutsex,I.作为普利策奖得主的诗人Youknow,foraPulitzerPrize-winningpoet,有时你表现出非凡的缺乏想象力sometimesyoudisplayaremarkablelackofimagination.所以他们才给我这个该死的奖Thatswhytheygavemethefuckingprize.别告诉我你从来没有经历过那个过程说过那些话Donttellmeyouveneverbeenthroughtheprocess,talkingthetalk?所以我有了一个家庭天哪Thatswhy
23、Ihaveafamily,forChristssake.说过那些话也许你应该再结婚Italktothem.Maybeyoushouldgetmarriedagain.乔治George!区分你的需求Bifurcateyourrequirements.如果你想可以和你妻子聊一聊Youlltalkthetalkwithyourwife,ifyoufeellikeit.或去博物馆看看所有你想要的戈雅们Gotothemuseums,lookatalltheGoyasthatyouwant,保留性♥爱♥部分为了性butkeepthesexpartjustforsex.好吧All
24、right.你还跟你妻子在一起乔治Doyoureallystilltalktoyourwife,George?♥平♥Ouuuh,.one-all.我不打mnothittingthat.偷偷溜走去抽烟Oh,sneakingoffforasmoke!你不应该抽烟Youknowyoushouldntsmoke.你每三周在这床上都说了一遍Youtellmethatinthisbedeverythreeweeks.我压力很大munderalotofpressure.我喜欢始终如一我也一样Iliketobeconsistent.-SodoI.大卫你已经劝我戒烟二十年了David
25、,youvetriedtogetmetoquitsmokingfor20years.从上你课的第一天起Sincethefirstdayofyourclass.天哪你的课让我抽烟了Oh,myGod,yourclassmademesmoke.我压力很大munderalotofstress.芝加哥怎么样克利夫兰Oh,howwasChicago?-Cleveland.芝加哥是上周亚特兰大Chicagowaslastweek.Atlanta.亚特兰大就在下周-你怎么像西北偏北的Atlantaisnextweek.-YousoundlikeCaryGrant加里格兰特inNorthByNorthwest.
26、笑吧1.augh.像个经营自己生意的女人Justtrybeingawomanrunningyourownbusiness.我以为你喜欢自己做老板是的是的Ithoughtyoulikedbeingyourownboss.-Ido.Oh,Ido,Ido.没错Ido.感谢上帝有这些小插曲ButthankGodfortheselittleinterludes,我只能说这些thatsallIcansay.你不接电♥话♥Arentyougonnagetthat?世界上只有一个人会在凌晨两点给我打电♥话♥Onlyonepersonintheworldw
27、ouldcallmeattwoo,clockinthemorning.留个口信1.eaveamessage.有没有收到电子邮件我需要跟你谈谈Didyougetmyemail?1reallyneedtotalktoyou.我早该知道肯尼Ishouldhaveknownbetter.-Kenny.而以为你这个时候会在家thantothinkyoudbehomeatthishour.或者你在家里舒舒服服自鸣得意Ormaybeyouarehomeandyourelisteningtothisallsnugandsmug蜷着身子听着andcurledup.三十五岁了还对我恨之入骨35yearsold,h
28、estillhatesmyguts.你抛弃了他Well,youranoutonhim.我放弃了一段婚姻就像摆脱百万年前的年轻和恐惧IranoutonamarriagethatIgotmyselfintooutofyouthandfearamillionyearsago.这就是你为解放付出的代价不这是他成为Thatsthepriceyoupayforliberation.-No,thatsthepricehepays被遗弃母亲的英勇捍卫者所付出的代价forbeingturnedintotheheroicdefenderoftheabandonedmother.我们中只有一个人能翻越这堵墙1mea
29、n,theresonlyoneofuscouldmakeitoverthewall,他还揪住我不放he,sstillonmycase.难道没有什么诉讼时效Imean,isnttheresomestatuteOflimitations?我努力过了真的vetried.Really,vetried.在他十二三岁的时候有一次Whenhewas12or13onetime,他来和我一起过夏天我带他去看大都会队hecametospendthesummerwithme,ItookhimtotheMets,他在接下来的五局都在男厕所里呕吐hespentthenextfiveinningsthrowingupin
30、themensroom.从那以后他就一直在吐那个电♥话♥就是他在吐Hesbeenthrowingupeversince,thatphonecallwashimthrowingup.你知道什么是野生的吗Andyouknowwhatswild?他就是肯尼科佩什Hessuccessful.KennyKepesh.备受尊重的医生我的医生儿子Well-respecteddoctor,mysonthedoctor.会说流利的法语已经结婚有了孩子HespeakspassableFrench,hesmarriedwithchildren.只要对着我他就会变成你刚才听到的那样It,s
31、onlywithmethatheregressestowhatyoujustheard.对不起我激动了msorry,hegetsmegoing.我以为你不再评论剧本了Ithoughtyoustoppedreviewingplays.那个看来还是有点乐趣Well,thatonelookedkindOfinteresting.可惜我要去亚特兰大我会去找乔治ToobadmgonnabeinAtlanta.-llgowithGeorge.宗教家庭教堂自助书籍Religion,family,church,self-helpbooks,牙齿这么白让人以为嘴里有手电筒menwithteethsowhitey
32、outhinktheresaflashlightintheirmouths.爱尤其是浪漫的爱情-爱1.ove!Especiallyromanticlove!-1.ove!鲜花小商场Flowers,mini-malls.没有什么比小商场更令人沮丧的了Theresnothingmoredepressingthanmini-malls.能干什么-小商场Whatdoyouthink?-Mini-malls!也许除了你的缺点你的恶习Exceptperhapsyourflaws,yourvices,你的抵押贷款你的yourmortgages,your.偷偷摸摸看着你沉睡的黑莓furtivelookstoy
33、oursleepingBlackBerrys.黑莓BlackBerrys!这个男人发现自己在这里头皮屑从我的头上掉下来Andthismanwhofindshimselfhere,dandrufffallingoffmyhead.空池安德烈拉马尔太棒了Thatwaswonderful.很高兴你喜欢-谢谢mgladyouenjoyedit.-Thankyou.找个地方喝一杯怎么样Wouldyouliketogosomewhereforadrink?不必勉强Wedonthaveto.我只是不习惯和名人在一起mjustnotusedtobeingoutwithacelebrity.除了每周在公共电视上
34、谈论一次文学Talkingaboutliteratureonpublictelevisiononceaweek偶尔为纽约客写一篇评论文章andwritingtheoccasionalreviewfortheNewYorker算不上什么名人doesntmakememuchofacelebrity.别忘了你那个享乐书籍Dontforgetyourrisquebooks.美国享乐主义的起源TheoriginsofAmericanhedonism.好吧如果你不喜欢被人盯着看1.ook,ifyoudontliketheideaofbeingstaredat,可以去我那里wecouldgotomyplac
35、e,那里只有我一个人盯着你thentheonlypersonstaringwillbeme.如果我去你家你会为我弹一曲吗IfIgotoyourplace,willyoudosomethingforme?有点生疏了Thatwasawful.还不错ThatwasOK.太棒了我也想学Thatwasamazing.IwishIcouldplay.上钢琴课吧你会喜欢玩的Takelessons.Youdenjoyplaying.如果你会弹钢琴就不会有这样高的评价了Ifyouknewmore,youwouldn,thavesuchahighopinionofmyplaying.你这是想要别人恭维你了Nowy
36、ourefishingforcompliments.这是节拍器Isthisametronome?就像心跳一样It,slikeaheartbeat.即使是伟大的钢琴家也有加速的问题Evengreatpianistshaveaproblemthattheycallacceleration.你真是很有魅力Youareaverycharmingman.难道你不知道Youknowthat,dontyou?如果这都是给你看节拍器的话我发誓这不是我发明的Ifthisallforshowingyouametronome,IswearIdidntinventit你能找到离开性还很迷人的人Canyoufindan
37、yonethatenchantingwithoutsex?没有Nobody.这是哪Whatisthis?暗室Itsmydarkroom.我以前自己冲洗照片Iusedtodevelopmyownpictures.怎么不做了没时间Soyoudon,tanymore?-No,notime.我可以去数码冲印虽然不是很懂IshouldgodigitalbutIcantreallyunderstandthatstuff.没错Ofcourseyoucan.谢谢Thankyou.给这位小公主的礼物因为她.somethingforthislittleprincessbecauseshes.她是照片的中心而不是她
38、的父母shesthecentreofthepicture,notherparents.王后和国王他们Thequeenandtheking,they,re.只是just.在镜子里像幽灵般的倒影ghostlyreflectionsinthemirror.她一定很想和你上♥床♥Well,shemusthavebeencuriousaboutgoingtobedwithyou.是啊这样她就可以告诉闺蜜们我们这些老男人Yeah,soshecouldtellhergirlfriendswhatamanofourage,uh,就像特写镜头一样islikeclose-up.我只是她
39、的一个新体验其中之一manewexperienceforher.Oneofmanytocome.她会记得我这个给她带去文化的老家伙Shellremembermeastheoldguywhogavehersomecultureontheway.好吧听起来不错你也会记住这样一件事对吧Well,thatsoundsaboutright,andyoushouldchalkituptothesamething,right?是啊Yeah.别再担心变老了gottastopworryingaboutgrowingold.得担心长大Worryaboutgrowingup.得谢谢你的幸运星能有这样的一次性偶遇Oh
40、,thankyourluckystarsforsuchaone-shotencounter.这不是一次的性偶遇Itwasntaone-shotencounter.你们还想继续下去Shecamebackformore?你有.我见过的最漂亮的乳♥房♥♥Youhavethemostbeautifulbreastsveeverseen.你很喜欢Youlikethem?我很崇拜Iworshipthem.还有一张漂亮的脸Andyouhaveabeautifulface.我无法停止注视thatIcantstoplookingat.你不知道吗Youknowsometh
41、ing?你就是一件艺术品Youreaworkofart.艺术品Aworkofart.真正的艺术品Arealworkofart.我们说说你吧1.etstalkaboutyou.你有多少女人-为什么这样说Haveyouhadmanywomen?-Why?大于五十还是小于五十Morethan50,orless?更多More?谁会去数Who,scounting?你呢Howaboutyou?不是很多Notmany.有多少Howmany?五十六五十七五十八Cincuentayseis,Cincuentaysiete,Cincuentayocho.五个Five.五个男朋友Fiveboyfriends.五个五
42、个Five.-Five.我懂了Isee.那么他们是谁很年轻对吧比我年轻Sowhowerethey?Theywere.Theywereyoung,right?Youngerthanme.当然比你年轻Ofcoursetheywereyounger.他们都是男孩Theywereboys.男孩Boys.真的Sure.你知道我做过最极端的事情是什么YouwannaknowthemostextremethingIeverdid?是什么What?有一次我和两个男人上♥床♥OnceIwenttobedwithtwoguystogether.两个男人Twotogether?他们是我儿
43、时的朋友而且Theyweremychildhoodfriends,and.就这样玩了一个晚上andthatshowitendeduponenight.我们三个喝醉了最后一起上♥床♥睡觉Thethreeofusweredrunkandweendedupinbedtogether.你们三个一起Allthreeofyou?在你十七岁的时候Butwhenyoure17,youknow,你做很多事情只是为了感觉你在成长youdoalotofthingsjusttofeellikeyouremoving.对Right.康斯薇拉Consuela.我的一生都致力于独♥
44、立♥Mywholelifewasdedicatedtoindependence,并不惜代价实现了我的目标andatsomecostIhadachievedmygoal.然而就在那一刻Nevertheless,itwasinthatmoment.我可怕的嫉妒诞生了thatmyterriblejealousywasborn.就在那时我意识到我永远也不会ThatiswhenIrealisedthatIwouldnever,ever真正拥有她reallypossessher.我每天都和她通电♥话♥否则我会感到焦虑1feelanxiousunlessIspeak
45、toheronthephoneeveryday可是交谈之后我还是感到焦虑andthenIfeelanxiousafterwevespoken.我提前完成一切都很顺利Ifinishedearly.Itwentreallywell.你穿什么服装Whatareyouwearing?在哪里Whereareyou?我知道会有个年轻人找到她并把她带走只是时间问题Iknewitsonlyamatteroftimebeforeayoungmanfoundherandtookheraway.我知道Iknew,因为我曾经就是那样做的年轻人becauseIwasoncethatyoungmanwhowouldhavedoneit.好吧这样甚至让你觉得年轻Well,atleastdoesitmakeyoufeelyoung?就像和一群二十岁的年轻人踢足球It,slikeplayingsocc
