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1、HESJUSTNOTTHATINTOYOU他其实没那么喜欢你女孩子不会忘记第一个喜欢过的男孩Agirlwillneverforgetthefirstboyshelikes.甚至是尴尬的过去Evenifthingsdontquiteworkout.你干嘛推我啊？Whydidyoudothat?因为你身上有狗屎味Becauseyousmelllikedogpoo.你真蠢跟狗屎似的Youresostupid,justlikedogpoo.你就是用狗屎做的！Youremadeoutofpoo!但通常会有人来说些安抚神伤的智慧话语Butusuallysomeoneistheretoofferwordso
2、fwisdom.是Made.狗.dog.屎做的.poo.宝贝Honey.你知道那小男孩为什么这么做这么说吗？.doyouknowwhythatlittleboydidthosethingsandsaidthosethings?因为他喜欢你It,sbecausehelikesyou.就是这样Andthereitis.这就是我们纠结的开端Thatsthebeginningofourproblem.这个小男孩欺负你是因为他迷上你了Thatlittleboyisdoingthoseterriblethingsbecausehesgotacrushonyou.你知道这是什么意思吗？Doyouknowwh
3、atthismeans?我们都被鼓励着去Wereallencouraged.不是被设定了.no,programmed.去相信这个事实-如果一个男人做点蠢事.tobelievethatifaguyactslikeatotaljerk.就意味着他喜欢你.thatmeanshelikesyou.问题是这样的:只因他太爱你了Helikesyoutoomuch.你这么漂亮又如此迷人Youretooprettyandtooawesome.没错他处理不来Yes.Hecanthandleit.显然那个叫PhiDelt的喜欢你ThatPhiDeltsoobviouslylikedyou.我肯定他只是弄丢了你的号
4、♥码msurehejustlostyournumber.他不敢约你出去是因为他被你成功的事业吓到了Hesnotaskingyououtbecausehesintimidatedbyyourprofessionalsuccess.他不约你是被你丰富的感情经历吓到了哦是这样啊相信我这只是因为他刚结束一段刻骨铭心的感情Trustme.Itsbecausehe,sjustgettingoutofaseriousrelationship.相信我这是因为他从未有过一段刻骨铭心的感情Trustme.Itsbecausehe,sneverhadaseriousrelationship.他可能忘了
5、你住哪间茅舍或者被狮子吃掉了你们人真好为什么我们要说这些互相安慰的话？Whydowesaythisstufftoeachother?可能是因为我们害怕.Isitpossiblethatitsbecausewe,retooscared.也很难开口承认这个明显的事实.anditstoohardtosaytheoneobvioustruth.这都写在大家脸上了.thatsstaringeveryoneintheface?他其实不那么喜欢你Janine说你是房♥地♥产♥经纪人SoJaninesaysyou,reareal-estateagent.对但我可不像那
6、种烂俗的经纪人Yeah,butmnotoneofthosecheesyones.把自己的大头照贴满巴士椅子和杂货店推车.thatputsmyheadshotsonbusbenchesandgrocerycarts.只是贴在飞盘和记事本上？Sojust,like,Frisbeesandnotepads?差不多吧Basically.这样更经典实际上也是我的创意Itsmuchclassier.Mythoughtsexactly.奇怪Janine之前为啥没想过介绍我们认识呢WonderwhyJanineneverthoughttointroduceusbefore.我不知道我不知道哦啊Idontkno
7、w.Idontknow.嘿你们好再喝点别的什么吗？你还想来一杯吗？Hey,guys.Wantanotherround?Youwantonemore?如果你要喝的话要是你想走我完全.Onlyifyoudo.Imean,ifyouneedtogetgoing,Itotally.口母Uh.好那好吧Okay,well.当然喝啦再来一杯Ketel伏特加混苏打？Sure.Onemore.Ketelandsoda?再来一杯啤酒谢谢Andabeer,please.马上送上Berightback.好的Conor我今晚过得很愉快很高兴认识你Well,Conor,Ihadareallynicetime.Itwasr
8、eallynicemeetingyou.再见再见Bye.Seeyou.嘿是我Hey,itsme.他人不错我觉得一切进展顺利He,scute,andIthinkitwentwell.我想在我们说话的这会儿他正给我家里留言呢And1thinkhemightbeleavingmeamessageathomeaswespeak.嘿是我只想跟你说我很想你Hey,itsme.JustwantedtoletyouknowIwasthinkingaboutyou.哦你真好ConOr谢谢你Oh,that,sverysweetofyou,Conor.Thanks.听着我想问你想不想出来吃点消夜1.isten,Iw
9、aswonderingifyouwantedtograbalatebite.今晚？我.Tonight?I.不了我本来要去见朋友的但我累坏了别生气哦No,Iwassupposedtomeetfriendsbutmburntout.Don,tbemadatme.不不会的我没生气我等你一会No,ofcourse,mnotmad.Well,llbeupforawhile.你想先付账吗？我会等你的Doyouwannagoaheadofme?llbeup.哦先别挂电&hearts话♥?好的Oh,canyouholdon?Okay.不用了没关系你只买♥&heartS1.件No,t
10、hatsfine.Youjusthaveonething,so.不是哦实际上我买♥♥了6瓶.No,technicallyIhavesix.我还在考虑要不要买♥♥口香糖我想还是你先结账吧.andmmullingoveragumpurchase,soIthinkyoushouldgo.好的Okay.我一会打给你吧1.etmecallyourightback.好的好的Allright.Okay.你好嘿Hi.Hey.这个和这个谢谢Justthatandthat,please.1射谢Thankyou.哦天啊Oh,myword.真的吗？不可能啊Ser
11、iously?Thatsnotpossible.我三天前才存的钱不可能就透♥支♥了Ijustdepositedcashthreedaysago,soitsjustnotpossible.哦不是那样的我再查一个号♥Oh,itsnotthat.1.etmechecksomething.恭喜你你中奖了Congratulations,youwon.什么？What?这是我们FunkyFall大促销活动你是我们本月第一千名顾客OurFunkyFallpromotion.Youreour100Othcustomerthismonth.什么？What?你别是开玩笑吧？
12、Areyoukiddingme?我从不开玩笑1dontdokidding.哦天啊真不敢相信太兴奋rOh,myGod.Ican,tbelievethis,itssoexciting.哦天啊我从未中过奖Oh,myGod.Ineverwonanythingbefore.这是我经历过的最激动的事了太惨了点对吧？Thisisthemostexcitingthingthateverhappenedtome.Isthatsad?对不我想不算是吧Yea.No.Idontthinkso.真的？没错Really?Yes.谢谢!过来Thankyou!Comehere.哇Wow.正当Terps球员冲向专场试着将Ast
13、heTerpsmovetomid-ice,tryingto.嘿嘿Hey.Hey.约会的怎样?还不错就那样Howwasthedate?Itwasfine.Whatever.你怎么在这儿？我家有线电视坏了Whyareyouhere?Mycablesout.加油Spiewak你可不是IceCapades（冰上表演团）Comeon,Spiewak,it,snottheIceCapades.你没听见过电♥话♥响对吧？Youdidnthearthephoneringbyanychance,didyou?对没有他♥娘♥的♥No,Ididn
14、t.ShitAnna又对我耍了老一套说“我一会打给你”Annagavemetheold,llcallyourightback.哦真惨对吧？多久了？Oh,shit,yeah?Well,howlongago?22分钟了Thatwas22minutesago.我要打回去吗？DoIcallback?你需要打回去？不当然不需要Shouldyoucallback?No,absolutelynot.我要打给她说我要睡觉rmgonnacallbackandsaymgoingtobed.什么？不是吧才9点半你就要-?What?No.Its9:30.Youregonna.?不这是个好主意No,itsagreati
15、dea.我都要打给她说“如果你想打电♥话♥给我别打了llcallandsay,Incaseyouweregonnacallmeback,dont.因为我要睡觉了绝妙的主意.becausellbesleeping.Ageniusidea.好吧不止那简直是无敌棒的主意Okay,no,that,sbrilliant.等你起来你可以告诉她“我现在起床了可以接你电♥话♥了”Whenyouwakeupyoucansay,11mawakenow,Imavailabletotakeyourcall.哦天啊等一下Oh,gosh.Asecond.很抱歉没事的
16、Sorryaboutthat.Itsallright.我.Iwas.等等我刚说到哪儿了？Wait,whatwasIsayingagain?你不希望和老妈一样某天起来.Youdontwannabelikeyourmother,wakeuponemorning.意识到自己从未追求过梦想.andrealizeyouneverpursuedyourdreams.我真是这么说的？IsthatwhatIwassaying?想嚼香糖吗？不了谢谢Youwantsomegum?No,thankyou.天啊这一次购物聊天聊得够久的了God,thatskindofheavyforagrocerychat.不没事的不
17、是吗？No,that,sokay.Isntit?抱歉我可能能够帮你Sorry.Iactuallymightbeabletohelp.没错我公♥司♥里面有个同事他专门负责搞音乐的客户Yeah,Iknowaguyatmyofficewhodealsexclusivelywithmusicclients.你不会开玩笑吧？口母喝Areyoukidding?Uh-uh.哦天啊Oh,myGod.难道你是我的救世主啊？不是Areyoumysaviororsomething?No.你能帮我拿一下吗？可以Canyouholdthisforasecond?Yeah.哦真是意外啊Oh,t
18、hisissounexpected.好吧Okay.我不能.Idont.我结婚了mmarried.我不能这么做1dontdothis.你不能做什么？不能帮助潦倒的歌♥手？Youdontdowhat?Youdonthelpstrugglingsingers?不能帮拥有瑜珈教练般性感身材的歌♥手Nothotyoga-instructingsingers.还非常有魅力.whoareincrediblycharming.口母Hm.好吧你可以你可以给我你的名片Well,youcould.Youcouldgivemeyourcard.这很正常对吧？这下总可以吧？Thatslegi
19、t,right?Isthatallowed?我可以给你Icoulddothat.好的没关系的对吧？Yeah.That,dbeokay,right?没错Yeah.很好非常谢谢你Great,thankyousomuch.别客气需要帮你拿到车上去吗？Course.Doyouneedhelptoyourcar?你停在哪儿了？不我自己可以的没事的Wheredyoupark?No,mfine.Itsokay.很高兴见到你我也是Itwasverynicetomeetyou.Yeah.好吧Okay.那是谁？Whowasthat?哦潜在客户哦Oh,thatwasaprospectiveclient.Oh.好吧O
20、kay.我可以跟女人说说话的你少来Icantalktoawoman.Itdoesnthavetobelikethat.哦当然可以No.Absolutelynot.开车吧放松Justdrive.Relax.嗨嗨Hi.Hi.今天过得怎样？很好Howyoudoing?Good.是吗？是啊我刚打完电♥话♥Yeah?Yeah.Ijustgotoffthephone.是吗？是啊跟我的妹妹Yeah?Yeah,withmylittlesister.她最近好吗？她要结婚了Howsshedoing?Shesgettingmarried.真的？Really?对Yeah.那很好啊Great
21、.你真的觉得很好？Youreallythinkthatsgreat?没错Yeah.Devon看起来Devonseemslike.“人还不错.agreatguy.所以你觉得他们结婚是好事Well,soyouthinkit,sgreatthattheyregettingmarried.但你没觉得我们一直没结婚.butyoudonteverfeellikeweregoingagainstnature,orsomething.其实很违背自然常理么.bynotgettingmarried?不觉得No.违背自然常理是指猫咪给猴了-喂奶Goingagainstnatureislikethecatwhosuc
22、kledthatmonkey.而我们只是恰巧没有结婚而已YouandIarejusttwopeoplewhohappennottobemarried.让我告诉你吧结婚的人都不可靠1.etmetellyousomething.Peoplewhogetmarriedarenottobetrusted.你真变♥态♥Youaresoweird.确实不可靠你知道为什么吗？Theyrenot.Youknowwhy?因为如果你真的觉得幸福老实说Becauseifyouaresolegitimatelyhappy,honestly.你就不需要去做场结婚秀来展示.youwouldn,
23、tfeeltheneedtomakeabigshowoutofit.你也不需要宣扬Youwouldnthavetobroadcastit.他们之所以这样做是没有安全感Theydoitbecausethey,reinsecure.他们觉得结婚是必须做的事.andtheythinkgettingmarriedswhattheyresupposedtobedoing.他们骗了自己也骗了他人Sotheyrelyingtothemselvesandtootherpeople.说真的Seriously.想想你和你的那些朋友对吧？Thinkaboutyouandyourfriends.Okay?那些跟你感情
24、很好的女友们.Thesewomenyouhavegreatrelationshipswith.你们很亲密其中一些相识多年.youreclosetothem,someofthemyouveknownforyears.但你不会需要Butyoudontfeeltheneed.付45美元的支票给马里兰州立院来取得一张友谊证明吧.towritea$45checktothestateOfMarylandforafriendshipcertificate.对不需要我懂你意思了是吧？Yeah.No,Igetthat.Right?你想我们之间不也是如此公Whyshoulditbeanydifferent,you
25、know,withmeandyou?我们很幸福我爱你我向你许下了承诺Wereveryhappy,Iloveyou,mcommittedtoyou.我们生活得很好对吧？.wehaveagreatlife,youknow?是的你说得没错Yes,youreright.为何我们不能沉浸在幸福中呢WhycantWejustbehappy?你说得没错Youreright.我去给你倒点茶好的mgonnagetyousomemoretea.Okay.请输人密♥码♥Pleaseenteryourpass.没有新留言Youhavenomessages.主菜单如需留言Mainmenu.T
26、osendamessage.好吧很明显他没打过来Okay,soclearlyhehasntcalled.也许他在出差路上Maybehesawayonbusiness.他是在巴德摩尔卖♥♥♥房♥♥子的经纪人Hesellsrealestate.InBaltimore.待在城里才是他的正经事没错Stayingintownishisbusiness.Right.好吧听着让我来告诉你吧Well,look,letmetellyou.我和Ben第一次约会后他隔了11天才给我打电♥话♥AfterIwentoutw
27、ithBenforthefirsttime,hedidntcallmefor11days.11天哎现在他却是世上最好的老公了Elevendays.Andnowhe,stheworldsbesthusband.这种事时常发生的Thathappensallthetime.真的？真的Really?Really.想喝咖啡吗？Youwantcoffee?给你调杯低咖♥啡♥因♥的吧谢谢Igotyou2percent.Thanks.这都是你的错Thisisallyourfault.什么？为什公啊？What?Why?是你介绍我们见面的Yousetusup.不是你问我是
28、否认识合适的王老五我把你的号♥码给了ConorNo.Youaskedmeif1knowanyguys,andIgaveConoryourphonenumber.这可不是做媒啊Thatsnotasetup.我要是想做媒啊就会权衡双方的优缺点WhenIdoasetup,Iweightheprosandcons.我会尽职调查1domyduediligence.对于Conor我只知道他卖♥♥了房♥子给我们AllIknowaboutConoristhathesoldusthishouse.说真的别打Seriously,stop.他说下班后经常去Ci
29、tySUPPer俱乐部玩HesaidhealwayshangsoutafterworkattheCitySupperClub.我需要假装路过进去看看吗？MaybeIshoulddoalittledrive-by?拜托别Pleasedont.他会打过来的Hellcall.如果他没打过来好吧我要问个问题干嘛要发明来电显示？WhydtheyeveninventcallerID?这种服务对谁有用呢？Its,like,whoisthisservicehelping?我是说几百年来.Imean,forcenturies.也许不到几百年但也是好多好多年来Okay,wellmaybenotcenturies,
30、butfor,like,alotandlotofyears.人们在不知对方是谁的情况下也接r电♥话♥.peoplehavebeenansweringtheirphone,notknowingwhoitis.目前据我所知还没人会因此毙命.andasfarasIcantell,noone,sdiedfromthat.就象是如果警♥察♥想杳出是谁打的他们可以去追踪Anditslikeifthepolicewannaknowwhoplacedacall,theycouldtraceit.我是谁呢是警♥察♥吗？Imean
31、,whatamI,thepolice?这种一直想知道是谁打来的困扰.Thisconstantobsessionwithneedingtoknowwhoscallingallthetime.真的是很烦人.its,like,sogross.就象是你接了电♥话♥你听出是谁自然就知道了1.ike,youpickupthephone,youfindoutwhoitis,thenyouknow.就象是Its,like.我想说的是.1.ook,allmsaying.如果一个男人没给我打电♥话♥我有权.ifaguydoesntcallme,Iwouldl
32、iketoreservetheright.每15分钟给他打一次电♥话♥直到他接为止.tocallhimat15-minuteintervalsuntilhepicksup.但是如果他看到是我的号♥码Butifhelooksdownandseesmynumbers.他就会觉得我有毛病.hesgonnathinkmsomekindofpsychoorsomething.但我不是Whichmnot.显然没有Obviously.你好？Hello?老妈Mom.我一会打给你Igottacallyouback.吸气仰面狗式动作Inhale.Upward-facing
33、dog.抬头望天1.ookuptowardstheceiling.抬头望天当招待过来时他又点了酒Heorderedmoredrinksforuswhenthewaitresscame.还记得我想喝的酒HerememberedexactlywhatIwanted.你主动拥抱我觉得认识我很高兴Heinitiatedthehug.Hesaiditwasnicemeetingme.慢着是在约会开始时还是结束时？Sowait.Thiswasattheendofthedateorthebeginningofthedate?结束时怎么了有什么问题吗？End.Why,doesitmatter?没错在约会开始时
34、说”很高兴认识你”这很正常Yeah.Nicemeetingyouatthebeginningofthedate,thatsnormal.而在约会结束:时说”很高兴认识你Nicemeetingyouattheendofthedate.那可能就没戏了Itcouldbeablowoff.也许是在开始时Maybeitwasatthebeginning.好吧那就好他会打过来的Okay.Thatsfine.Hesgonnacall.也许是在结束时Ormaybeitwasattheend.也许他只是觉得认识我很开心Ormaybeitwasjustnicetomeetme.求助Help.嘿这真是头痛Hi.Th
35、isistorture.我怎么能找到简练和动态的词来形容HowamIsupposedtocomeupwithsomethingpithyanddynamic.来形容肉桂汤？.tosayaboutcinnamonblends?我现在没心思理这些肉豆蔻的东西Itshardtofocusonnutmeg.尤其是在这个可能是我梦想的男人.whentheguywhomightbetheguyofmydreams.拒绝给我来电♥话♥的时候.refusestocallme.在我和Neil的第一次约会后AftermyfirstdatewithNeil.我打电♥话&he
36、arts;给他.Icalledhim.现在没有谁先谁后的限定了Therearenorulesanymore.我是说你干嘛非得等他主动打过来呢？And,Imean,whyshouldyouhavetowaitforhimtogetoffhisass?通了这很正常It,sringing.Thatsprettystandard.嘿我是Conor很好!语♥音♥信箱Hey,youvereachedConor.Yes!Voicemail.请留言我会回电的笔记1.eaveamessage,llgetbacktoyou.Notes.嘿Conor我是Gigi“Hey,Conor,it
37、sGigi.我在想我都没有接到你的电♥话♥Ijustthought,Ihadntheardfromyou.女孩子一定要等到男生给她打电♥话♥太蠢了对吧?”.andhowstupidisitthatagalhastowaitforaguy,scallanyway,right?这写的什么啊？这写的什么啊？Whatdoesthatsay?Whatsthatsay?因为我们是平等的对吧？Becausewereallequal,right?比平等更平等Morethanequal.女子进入法学院的数量比男子多Morewomenareacceptedi
38、ntolawschoolnowthanmen.我不知道你是否看Dateline节目And,Imean,IdontknowifyousawthatDateline.但是女人现在也可以有阴♥茎♥了对吧？那么.butwomenpracticallyhavepenisesnow,right?So.打给我Callme.我是Gigi打给我Oh,thisisGigi.Callme.别担心他肯定会打过来的Dontworry,hestotallygonnacall.什么？What?怎么会没有拨号♥音？怎么会没有拨号♥音？Howcantherenotbead
39、ialtone?Howcantherenotbeadialtone?没有拨号♥音快点来啊拨号♥音Nodialtone.Comehere,dialtone.Gigi你在吗？Gigi,areyouthere?嗨Gigi?Hello,Gigi?老妈是你啊？是的Mom,isthatyou?Yes.我现在不能跟你聊了我等会打给你等等我需要你去Icanttalknow,I1callyouback.Wait,Ineedyouto.嘿我是Janine请留言Hi,itsJanine.1.eaveamessage.嘿Janine是我Hi,Janine,itsme.Conor没有打过来C
40、onornevercalled.所以我极度想去CitySupper俱乐部看看.somontheprecipiceofstagingacasualrun-inattheCitySupperClub.如果你想阻止我就接电♥话♥吧Pickupifyouwannastopme.好吧你既然沉默那我就当你同意咯拜拜Allright,minterpretingyoursilenceastacitcompliance.Bye.你好啊靓妞儿们？嘿Whatsup,girl?Hey.你好吗？很好Howareyou?Good.敲门咯敲门咯Knock,knock.嘿Hey.那么.So.又来了
41、还是那套.hereweare.Sameshiftagain.我知道我在制定计划记得吧？Iknow.Imaketheschedule.Remember?好吧我以为这不是巧合Well,Ifigureditwasnocoincidence.我.Ihad.那晚跟你在一起很开心.agoodtimetheothernight.是Yeah.你喝10杯都没事真是让人吃惊Itsamazingwhere10shotsofPatrilTanwillgetyou.那么我想着SoIwasthinking.下班之后我们能.afterworkwecould.你知道的Youknow.好吧KelliAnn那晚上我们玩得很开心1
42、.ook,KelliAnn,whathappenedbetweenustheothernightwasfun.的确很有意思Itwasdefinitelyfun.但是我们今晚人手不足我自己还得去吧台帮忙Butwerewayunderstaffedtonight.Ievenhavetomanthebar.所以我才安排你来的SothatswhyIscheduledyou.来工作Towork.那么So.都清楚了吧Arewegood?嗯清楚了好的Nope,weregood.Okay.等等KeIliAnnHey,oh,KelliAnn.宝贝能帮我把门关一下么Hey,babe,couldyougetthed
43、oor?Thanks.你好你是来吃晚餐的么还是.Hi.Areyoujoiningusfordinner,or?我等人一位先生mmeetingsomeone.Aguy.为什么什么Why?Hm?没什么对不起吃晚餐么Nothing.Sorry.Fordinner?我就在吧台等吧llwaitatthebar.那是个不错的主意Thatsagreatidea.我能给你来点什么WhatcanIgetyou?不我在等人Oh,no,mmeetingsomeone.是么约了个大帅哥？Ohyeah?Whayougotahotdate?我不知道是不是可以用“大帅哥”来形容Idontknowifyoudcallitho
44、t.这个Conor只和我出去约会过一次ThisguyConorandIhaveonlybeenoutonetime.等等ConorBarry公Waiwait,wait.ConorBarry?是的Yeah.Conor今晚不来非常感谢Conorsnotcomingintonight.Thanksalot.他是不是忘了要跟你在这见面了Didheforgethewassupposedtomeetyouhere?好吧我说的“等人”是个广义上的说法Oh,see,whenIsaidmeetingsomeone,11guessitwaskindofabroadterm.”等”这个字是有很多意思的Awideinterpretationofth
