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1、对于学生“心理孤儿”现象成因及对策的探析中英文对照For the causes and solutions of the phenomenon of students psychological orphans in Chinese and English.随着社会的发展，科学技术的突飞猛进，交通更为便捷，地球成了一个“村庄”，人与人之间外在的物质的交往更加频繁密切。但与此相对应，心灵的沟通却相应减少，人的内心世界包裹得更紧，人的心理疾病患病率有增无减。一位著名的心理医生曾谨慎地说：“你可以随意站在都市的任何一个角落，然后把你见到的人从1数到20，那么必定有一个心理障碍者。”作为“地球村”村民
2、的一员中小学生的心理健康问题也不容乐观。眼下的中小学生生活在这钢筋水泥的丛林里，背负着沉重的考试压力，与外界的接触更少，交往的范围更狭窄，“精神家园”日渐封闭，心理问题十分严重。“心理孤儿”现象便是其中的一种。所谓“心理孤儿”现象是相对社会学意义上的孤儿而言的。是指学龄阶段的儿童、青少年在心理上自我封闭，游离集体氛围，家庭亲子关系冷漠，怯于交往、社会生活难于融入的特征。“心理孤儿”实际是一种心理不健全现象。“心理孤儿”学生，不象问题学生或不完整家庭学生那样容易引起人们的关注。因此，我们更有必要分析“心理孤儿”现象产生的原因，并寻找改变这种现象的策略，以促进学生健康成长。With the dev
3、elopment of society, science and technology make a spurt of progress, traffic is more convenient, the earth has become a village , the external physical interaction between people more frequent. But correspondingly, the communication of heart is correspondingly reduced, the inner world of man wrappe
4、d tightly, rate of increase in the persons mental disease. A famous psychologist has cautiously said: you can stop anywhere in the city, then you see people from 1 to 20, then there must be a mental disorder. As the global village - a member of the mental health of primary and middle school students
5、 is not optimistic. The students live in the reinforced concrete jungle, burdened with the heavy pressure of examinations, and less contact the outside world, the range of communication is more narrow, the spiritual home is closed, the psychological problem is very serious. Psychological orphans phe
6、nomenon is one of them. The so-called psychological orphans phenomenon is relatively the sociological significance of the orphan. Refers to the children, school-aged youth self closed in the psychology, free collective atmosphere, family indifference, afraid to features of communication, social life
7、 is difficult to integrate into. Psychological orphans is a real psychological unhealthy phenomenon. Psychological orphans students, not as a student problem students or incomplete family that easy to cause the attention of people. Therefore, we have the necessity analysis of the causes of psycholog
8、ical orphans phenomenon, and seek to change this phenomenon strategy, in order to promote the healthy growth of students.一、“心理孤儿”现象产生的原因One, psychological orphans phenomenon1、问题家庭给子女带来了严重的心理问题。1, family brought serious psychological problems for children.“问题家庭”是相对于“和谐家庭”而言的，它指的是在家庭关系的处理上存在着这样或那样的不和谐
9、因素。主要有这么几种：一是家庭不和睦，父母关系紧张，“大吵三六九，小吵天天有。”（据中国家庭调查，每周纠纷在两次及以上的：30岁以下组占52%，3045岁组战34%，4560岁组占21%，60岁以上组占16%）生活在这样家庭中的孩子往往处在紧张不安之中，甚至被父母当作出气筒；二是父母不完整，或是父母离异（统计数字表明，今天的离婚率将近22%），把子女当作“皮球”任意踢来踢去；或是父母一方早逝，家庭经济负担重，一天到晚为生计而奔波，无暇顾及子女。这样的家庭环境中成长起来的孩子往往没有安全感，容易产生压抑、烦躁、自卑、孤僻、冷漠、仇视等变态心理，有的甚至走上犯罪道路。 Family is rela
10、tive to the harmonious family is concerned, it refers to the existence of this or that factors of disharmony in family relationships. There are several: a family not harmonious, parental tension, about three six nine, a small argument every day. ( according to Chinese household survey, a dispute in
11、two and above : 30 years old of the following groups accounted for 52%, 30 - 45 years old group and 34%, 45 - 60 age group accounted for 21%, 60 years old accounted for 16% ) living in such families children are often nervous, even by parents as a punching bag two is not complete; parents, or parent
12、s divorced ( statistics show that, todays divorce rate of nearly 22% ), put the children as ball arbitrary kicking; or one of the parents died young, family economic burden, all day long to living, too busy children. Grew up in such a family environment, children often do not have the security sense
13、, prone to depression, irritability, inferiority, withdrawn, aloof, hatred and other psychological metamorphosis, and some even go on the road of crime.2、 父母顾了事业难顾家庭，缺少与子女的沟通交流，久而久之使子女的内心世界封闭起来。2, the cause of difficult parents Gu Gu family and children, lack of communication, in the course of time
14、the children s inner world closed.随着改革开放的进一步深入，我国将加快与国际接轨的步伐。生活的节奏更快，竞争意识更加突出，危机感更加强烈，作为父母工作压力更大。于是为了工作为了事业，平时无暇顾及自己的孩子，要么把子女托付给爷爷奶奶，要么雇保姆照看。自己很少安排时间与子女在一起沟通交流，一起聊天做事，使子女与父母之间容易产生“陌生感”和“距离感”，使自己的子女在心灵深处形成一个不愿轻易向人开启的自我封闭的世界。有心理学家指出，如果家长对孩子冷淡、拒绝将造成孩子自卑、焦虑、退缩，或反抗、适应困难。With the further deepening of refo
15、rm and opening up, China will speed up the pace with international standards. A faster pace of life, competition consciousness is more prominent, the sense of crisis is more intense, as parents greater work pressure. So in order to work for the cause, usually to attend to their children, or their ch
16、ildren to the care of Grandpas grandmother, or hire a babysitter. He seldom arrange the time and the children to communicate together, doing things together chat, so easy to produce strangeness and sense of distance between parents and children, so that their children form a reluctant in the mind ea
17、sily to open self closed world. Some psychologists pointed out, if the parents of the child cold, refused to cause the child to inferiority, anxiety, withdrawal, or against, to.3、家庭教育缺乏科学性、民主性，方法简单，亲子关系紧张。3, family education is lack of science, democracy, the method is simple, parent-child relations
18、.目前，中小学生的家长大多是“文革”时期成长起来的，由于历史原因，他们的文化学习被耽误，心理上受影响，经过拨乱反正，一部分人抓住机遇而重新走进学校，但仍有不少人因心有余力不足而未能弥补过去在文化上的“空白”。因此，他们对家庭教育科学不甚了了，对待子女的教育方法也大都沿袭长辈的传统或通过大众传播媒介获得。一位中学生家长曾对孩子的老师说：“老师，说起来心理很惭愧，如今糊里糊涂当了家长，却不知道怎样来教育自己的孩子”。这样的家长在对子女的教育上，往往走两个极端：一是由于家长补偿心理的影响，“望子成龙”“望女成凤”非常心切。“文革”使这些家长成为像错过季节的庄稼，他们是带着无尽的遗憾步入社会、步入中年
19、的。他们把不能实现的理想寄托在子女身上，节衣缩食为子女竭力提供物质条件，把子女放在至关重要的地位，惟恐错过这个成长季节。他们把子女逼进书房题海，稍有不从，或用大道理压人或“棍棒相加”（据一位全国优秀辅导员对某小学的调查，全班48名学生，没有挨过父母打的孩子只有1人，27%的家长用棍子），结果是父母与子女的关系紧张，达不到预期的目的；二是重养不重教。重肌体健康，轻心理健康；重物质投入，轻精神投入。随着生活水平的提高，中小学生的营养状况大为改善，中小学生的生理发育明显提前，但中小学生的心理发育由于家庭、学校的保守、封闭滞后于生理发育，对子女的思想、情感、内心世界的关注更少，父母与子女的心灵沟通成了
20、“被遗忘的角落”。At present, students parents are mostly grew up in the Cultural Revolution period, due to historical reasons, their cultural learning is delayed, the psychological impact, after bring order out of chaos, a part of the people to seize the opportunity and go back to school, but there are stil
21、l many people because the Xinyou Yu could not make up for past in culture. Blank . Therefore, they do on family education, education method to treat their children also mostly followed the elders or obtained through the mass media. A high school students parents told children teacher said: teacher,
22、that psychology is very ashamed, now in disorderly fashion when the parents, do not know how to educate their children . . . The parents in the education of their children, often go to two extremes: one is due to the influence of parents of psychological compensation, Wangzichenglong women look into
23、 the Phoenix very eager. The Cultural Revolution that these parents become like miss the season crops, they are with endless regret into the community, into the middle of the. They have not achieve ideal on children, scant oneself in food and clothes to provide material conditions for the children t
24、o, send their children to be of utmost importance, for fear of missing the growing season. They put their children into the study sea, not from a little, or truth pressure or sticks together ( according to a national outstanding counselors to a primary school survey, a class of 48 students, parents,
25、 children and never had to play only 1 people, 27% of the parents with a stick . ) The result is tight, the relationship between parents and children, can not reach the expected purpose; two is incapable of education. Light weight body health, mental health; heavy material investment, light spirit i
26、nto. With the improvement of living standards, the nutritional status of primary and middle school students to improve primary and secondary school students, physical development significantly ahead of schedule, but the students psychological development because of the family, the school, the conser
27、vative closed behind the physical development of children, thought, emotion, inner world concern less, parents and children to communicate. Forgotten corner .4、独生、独门独户，把同龄人拒之门外，缺少伙伴。4, single, self-contained, the peers shut sb., lack of partners.随着城乡住宅建设的发展，成千上万家庭的住房条件得到了不同程度的改善，不少家庭搬进了套房或别墅，摆脱了“老小三
28、口一张床，煤炉、马桶去一房，一门多户矛盾多，三代同堂难分房”的困难境地。家庭居住条件改善了，生活环境优化了，中小学生有了属于自己的小天地，这有利于他们的学习和休息。但独门独户的居住环境缩小了儿童青少年的生活范围，“躲进小楼成一统，管它春夏与秋冬”，与同龄人的交往大大地减少。要么与父母、祖父母作伴，要么独处一室。许多心理学家做过实验，结果表明孩子的天性是合群的。当他们与大人在一起的时候，多少是拘谨的，不能达到无所不言、无所不为的“自由”境界，而一旦与同龄或基本上同龄的孩子在一起的时候，他们那种高兴劲头是成人难以理解的。而孩子长期独处，又会使他们的气质受到损害，养成一种胆怯、怕事、怕交往的不良心理
29、。With the development of urban and rural residential construction, tens of thousands of family housing conditions have been improved to varying degrees, many families moved into a suite or villa, get rid of the old mistress and a bed, coal stove, toilet to a real, a multi-family contradictions, thre
30、e generations of hard housing difficult situation. Familys living conditions improve, the living environment optimization, primary and middle school students have their own small world, which facilitates their study and rest. But the single living environment reduces the child and adolescent life, r
31、un into a unified story, it spring summer autumn and winter , and greatly reduce communication peers. Company or with their parents, grandparents, or in a room alone. Many psychologists have done experiments, results show that the nature of the child are gregarious. When they and adults together, ho
32、w much is stiff, can not achieve not words, stop at nothing free state, once with peers or basically children together, they kind of happy spirit is difficult to understand the adult. And the children of long-term alone, and will make their temperament is compromised, form a kind of bad psychologica
33、l timid, timid, afraid of communication.二、减少“心理孤儿”现象的对策In two, reduce the psychological orphans phenomenon1、加强问题家庭父母的责任感，孩子是无辜的。1, strengthen the sense of responsibility of parents, the child is innocent.家庭是孩子人生中一所永不毕业的学校，父母是孩子的第一任老师，教育好子女是父母的天职。作为问题家庭的父母绝不能因个人的情感、是非问题而置自己的子女于不顾。教育家马卡连柯告诉我们：“你们生育教养子
34、女，不仅是为了父母的愉快，在你们家庭里，在你们影响下，成长着未来的公民，未来的事业家，未来的战士。”翻译家傅雷提醒我们：“爸爸不为儿子烦心，为谁烦心？爸爸不帮助孩子，谁帮助孩子？儿子有苦恼不向爸爸求救，向谁求救？”为此，经常争吵的父母要学会理智，忙于应酬的应尽可能早点回家，经济不宽裕的也尽量不要牺牲养育孩子的时间去挣钱。即使是分道扬镳的也要计划好育子的方案，方可说声“再见”。The family is the childs life a never graduated from the school, parents are the first teachers of the children
35、, educate their children is the bounden duty of parents. As the parents can not because of personal feelings, is not a problem for their children. Educator Ma Caren Co told us: your fertility parenting, not only to parents happy, in your family, in your growing up under the influence, the citizens o
36、f the future, the future of the cause, the soldier of the future. Translator Fu Lei reminds us: father is not for son worry, worry for who? Dad doesnt help the child, who help the child? Son to father Distress not for help, who can help me? Therefore, often quarrel for the parents to learn to reason
37、, busy business should as far as possible to go home early, economy is not bounteous also try not to sacrifice the child-rearing time to earn money. Even the part company each going his own way also to the planned birth program, we say goodbye .2、加强沟通意识，留些时间与孩子交往。2, strengthen communication consciou
38、sness, take some time to contact with children.作为父母不仅要关心孩子的衣食住行，更要关心孩子的内心和精神世界。对孩子的内心世界忽视和冷漠会导致很多心理问题和品德问题。为此，作为家长应多与子女进行思想交流，了解自己子女的思想脉搏。随着生产力的提高和劳动生产日的逐渐缩短，节假日日益增多，作为父母也应提高闲暇的水平和质量，多安排一些时间给孩子。可以琴棋书画，可以种花、吟诗、听音乐、集邮、旅游、登山。切莫把大量与家人团聚共享天伦之乐的美好时光消磨在“筑长城”或舞池中。英国首相布莱尔作为一国之主，尚且腾出时间与孩子共度周末。我们普天之下的父母们更应多留一些
39、时间给孩子，多一些交流，多一些沟通。As parents should not only care about the childs basic necessities of life, should be more concerned about the childs inner world and spiritual. The childs inner world of neglect and apathy may lead to many psychological problems and moral problems. Therefore, as parents should be
40、with their children to communicate, to understand their childrens thoughts pulse. With the increase of productivity and the Labor Day holiday shortened gradually, more and more, as parents should also improve the level and quality of leisure, arrange some time for the children. Can fancies of men of
41、 letters, can plant a flower, listen to music, poetry, collecting stamps, tourism, mountaineering. Do not put a lot with my family while sharing the happiness of a family union wonderful time in building the Great Wall or the floor. British Prime Minister Tony Blair as master of the state, have spar
42、e time with the children and spend the weekend. We all over the world parents should leave some time for the children, more exchanges, more communication.3、改进教育方法，发扬民主作风，转换角色，既是长者，又是朋友。3, improve the teaching methods, develop a democratic style of work, change the role, is the elders, and friends.作为
43、父母要了解儿童青少年成长的生理、心理知识，并按照他们的生理、心理规律来办。我们要反对“棍棒型”“溺爱型”的家庭教育方式，倡导“民主型”的家庭教育方式。对孩子要讲民主和平等，要给孩子更多的发言权，使民主成为家庭一面永远飘扬的旗帜。不管是父母还是子女，在政治上大家是平等的，家长不仅是孩子慈爱的父母，循循善诱的导师，志同道合的同志，而且是真诚的朋友。据调查分析，中小学生喜欢“朋友式”的父母亲，而不喜欢“牧师式”、“师徒式”的父母亲。心理学家提出“家长民主意识的十条建议”，值得我们家长参考：不训斥孩子，经常训斥会形成厌烦的气氛。不当别人的面批评孩子，尊重孩子的人格。纠正缺点不要笼笼统统，总体否定，应具
44、体就事论事。不要显示权威，而是提出具体办法。决不打击孩子，如“我有你这孩子真倒霉”一类的话。尽量应用表扬和鼓励。尊重孩子意见。多说：“你自己决定”。常交谈。与孩子的朋友建立联系，邀他们到家玩。As parents to understand children adolescent physiological, psychological knowledge, and in accordance with their physiological, psychological laws to do. We must oppose sticks indulgent family education,
45、 advocacy of democratic family education. The children talk about democracy and equality, to give children more right to speak, so that democracy has become the home side is always a waving flag. Whether parents or children, in politics, everyone is equal, parents is not only loving parents, be good
46、 at giving systematic guidance teacher, gay, and that is a sincere friend. According to the survey analysis, primary and middle school students like friends parents, and dont like priest , mentoring parents. Put forward ten suggestions parents democratic consciousness psychologist, worthy of our ref
47、erence: the parents not to reprimand the child, often scolded will form the boring atmosphere. The improper others criticized the child, respect the childs personality. The correct dont cage series, total negation, should take the matter on its merits. Do not display the authority, but put forward s
48、pecific measures. It will not hit the child, such as I have you this boy really unlucky a class of words. The possible application of praise and encouragement. The respect for the views of children. say: your own decision . often talk. To establish contact with their friends, had them play.4、创造空间，营造
49、良好的伙伴交往环境。4, create the space, to create a good partner communication environment.老一辈的教育家刘绍禹先生曾语重心长地谈到了教育儿童的原则：“儿童应与年龄相同的儿童生活，然后才能学得与人相处之道。与成年人一起，相依赖式的自卑心理，颇难打破，将来离家入社会是莫大之困难。”因此，家长要想方设法创造条件为子女提供与小伙伴交往的时间和空间。放学路上少接送，让子女与其他小朋友结伴而行；周末和节假日让子女邀请小伙伴来家玩，鼓励子女利用空闲时间与同学小伙伴进行电话交流，或主动到四邻八舍走动。通过串门，扩大交往的范围，学会与各种人交往的经验，消除一个人独处的寂寞。5、 建立学生
